Action Figures & Their Beers - Mando-tory Reading!

by Beedo Sookcool
on 2012-09-12, 21:07:57

MYTHOS

First off, a brief apology for this week's article being late. Working night shifts messes with my sense of time. Sorry! And now, for this week's beer and toy one-two combo . . . .

Mythos is described on its label as “Hellenic lager beer.” This could mean any number of things. Occam’s Razor suggests that it probably just means it’s Greek beer, as opposed to beer that relates to the ancient Greek culture between circa 1050 and 300 BC, before the advent of Alexander the Great. (After which time, it would be Hellenistic lager beer.) Another double award winner (2001 International Beer & Whiskey Competition and 2008 ITQ), it’s got “Premium Quality” written thrice on its neck-label alone.

The people to go along with this product have to be the Mandalorians. Mandos are essentially Spartans In Space (the proper Karen Traviss Mando’ade, that is, not the whiter-than-white CGI Clone Wars wusses), and their T-visor helmets are heavily reminiscent of a hoplite’s helmet minus the plumes and crests. The other reason these guys match up with this beer is because the Mandalorian symbol, the horned skull-crown known as the kyrbes, is made from a mythosaur skull. The funny thing is, Mythos’ logo is a unicorn, which I don’t recall featuring heavily in Greek mythology. Winged horses, half-man-half-horses, sure. But not many horned horses.

Okay, granted, “unicorn” is just the Latin equivalent of the Greek “monoceros,” which means “one-horn,” so presumably, there must’ve been one-horned creatures in Greek mythology, but you don’t really hear about them much. The only things called Monoceros I can think of are an old name for a type of rhino, and the constellation, which supposedly depicts a unicorn. Or possibly a rhino. They may have given us theater, sport, democracy, law, and any number of good things, but the ancients were as dense as concrete baklava when it came to nature. I mean, come on, they sincerely thought that giraffes were the outcome of camels and leopards doing the deed.

Anywho, while it’s a very good thirst-quencher, Mythos is a half-liter of 4.7% ABV average-ness. It’s nicely beery, and that’s about it. Nothing leaps out at me in terms of flavour or aroma and commands my attention. But if you need to drink something not just to slake your thirst, but to slay it, or wash down some savoury snacks while watching the telescreen-o-vision, Mythos will do the job and do it well, just like any Spartan or Mando. But I can think of a couple of tastier ways to do so.

Drink this if you also like: Stroh’s, Discovery, any other really thirst-quenching lagers or ales.