Scott "Marblehead" is a disgruntled former Hasbro employee, an expert in all things Star Wars, and a finder of rare antiquities. If you would like your question answered by the master, Ask Scott Something! The Prevailing Wisdom Posted by: Marblehead 12-5-01 12:01am Hello, I have visited www.creaturecantina.com and noticed that your website is not listed on some search engines. I am sure that through our service the number of people who visit your website will definitely increase. SeekerCenter is a unique technology that instantly submits your website to over 500,000 search engines and directories -- a really low-cost and effective way to advertise your site. For more details please go to SeekerCenter.net. Give your website maximum exposure today! Looking forward to hearing from you. Best Regards, Vanessa Lintner Sales & Marketing www.SeekerCenter.net Ahh, thank you Vanessa. I would love to be included on your "service." I've been seeking a center such as yours for years...but it seems I've always had to dodge the law whenever I attempted to meet someone over this fantastic electronic media that oozes with sex. If I could be included on your "over 500,000" engines, that would top my previous record of 400,000 licks of the lap where my load must explode. I need a hole, I don't need no hips, I'll give you that taste of d..., er, um, weenie, on your lips. This "service" could be just what I need, and all in time for Christmas! Head for the mountains. Scotterous How much would a naked cokehead Princess Leia action figure go for? Phillip DaBowl Wahlwahla, WA Dear Phil, My personal feelings would be to hang onto her, hang onto her as long as you can...until she starts to shake too much. Personally, I'd be very interested in any woman who's into coke... she's not afraid to stick painful, abrasive and addictive things in her nose, or mouth for that matter. How much do you want for the "action" figure. Money talks, I should know, mine always says "good-bye!" Scott Hi. I visited WWW.SWDRAWINGS.COM, and noticed that you're not listed on some search engines! I think we can offer you a service which can help you increase traffic and the number of visitors to your website. I would like to introduce you to TrafficMagnet. We offer a unique technology that will submit your website to over 300,000 search engines and directories every month. You'll be surprised by the low-cost, and by how effective this website promotion method can be. To find out more about TrafficMagnet and the cost for submitting your website to over 300,000 search engines and directories, visit www.TrafficMagnet.net. Would you like me to send you an introduction to how we can make WWW.SWDRAWINGS.COM listed on more search engines? I would love to hear from you. Best Regards Christine Hall Sales and Marketing E-mail: christine@trafficmagnet.net http://www.trafficmagnet.net Sorry Christine, but I do believe that Vanessa has beaten you by 200,000. Now, I know I'll be exhausted and probably need a splint but we all need to go for the numbers during this time of confusion. It's easy to install. Scott Hey Scott, I heard from another site that your the person to go to for drawing a SW character. Is this so? If it is, could you sketch my character? My friend has a character as well and he might like to see what you could do. I dunno, tell me what you think. Dear Slimshadey, It all sounds pretty sketchy to me. Let's keep our clothes on for the first few interviews. This, of course, is just speaking for myself. Big bad Bill is the publishing artist of this site so he may be able to draw a new conclusion...but after this proposition he may well be sweet William now. The undisputed price leader. Scott So Scott - I like the column. Two questions. I have better ideas than Hasbro, so why don't they hire me? They can just pay me with figures. Question two is why did you get laid off? Did you let them in on the fact that distribution sux, that they should have a figure program for die hard fans or for the fact that the man kept you down? Dan P. Stroudsburg, PA Dear P.an, if you only want to be paid off in figures, you are selling yourself short. Plastic is cheap, very cheap and your bills can be very expensive. Just wait until you move out from under mom and dad's glass umbrella, then you will learn the real value of earned money and not quoted "book" prices of plastic. Many reasons I could site for being laid off, not lest of which is Hasbro's desire to expand too quickly beyond their means. PA is close to RI, give 'em a call. In the attic toys...I'll be back, Scott Dear Scott, The other day I was in the bathtub with my collection of vintage figures, a bar of Ivory soap (98% pure and it floats like a barge ! ), and my toothbrush. A couple hours later I noticed lots of scaling in ( this is embarrassing but I have no one else to ask ) the "groin area", and the next day my gums were bleeding really bad. One of my figures did have that grayish tinge to the old paint, and another was yellowed like some of the bubbles on my carded figures. Is it possible to "catch something" from my bathtub buddies ? Mom always said it was okay to do this, but I admit I'd forgottten about it for a long time, till the other day. Mom remarried my doctor so I can't ask her or anyone at her office; help me Scott, is there treatment for my condition ? Please don't use my real name, I get teased enough about collecting as it is. Sincerely, Squeeky Clean, But Boy My Joints are Tight. Dear Tight Boy Joints, I never recommend taking plastic into the tub...unless it's a little fellow who's cute 'n yellow and chubby, rubber duck, ducky. As for the scaling, I'd recommend smoother figures. Leave out the rough and abbrasive Chewy's, Ewoks and good god, FX-7...ouch. Stick with the smoother examples such as R2, Amanaman (reminds me of a tape worm), or even a few samples of Lando, he was smooth with that chilly Colt 45. I wouldn't neccessarily recommend using bath and body soap on the gums, especially while still using a loofa sponge. As for you mother, I think she may have been thinking about something other than Star Wars figures when you asked her about taking small, plastic items into the bath. Rubber ducky you're the one, you make bath-time lots of fun. Scott-squeek okay, here goes. as an insider [past tense?] to the toy industry, can you explain the idea and origin of "store exclusives" to me? how is it possible that hasbro can make any profit on these? an example for me is the 12" speederbike. i want one of these very badly. i collect SW stuff, which makes me a consumer of their product line. i've never even seen one of these, except of course on freakin' e-bay! they seem to have been available [?] for a very short period of time, and then GONE! that's it! no more! history! very frustrating to a collector, to say the least. i guess my main question is how can they afford to do this? my understanding is it can take well over a year to complete the process of producing a toy from the design concept to the final product. this sounds rather expensive to me, and it seems they would want to mass produce alot of them to be worth the time and talent that goes into a product. well, where the hell are they?!? or perhaps the store chain is to blame for bad shipping, etc.? i've seen this debated often, with inconclusive results. any light you can shed on this crap would be greatly appreciated. i just wanna cope, and perhaps even understand. thanks for your time. peace, brad k. DockingBay94@nni.com Dear Peacekeeper, Good question and I'm sure many collectors ask themselves this each time they go to the store only to come out empty handed. The reality is that these types of exclusives are, for the most part, initiated by the retailer themselves (Target, TRU, Walmart, etc.) Hasbro has little blame in the lack of supply. The retailer (Target, TRU, Walmart, etc.) will approach Hasbro with the concept of wanting an exclusive item for their store. The idea for this exclusive item is to simply increase the amount of traffic that this limited item will generate since it is not available at any other retailer. The concept is to attract customers to their store rather than the competition because they (the store) has this particular Star Wars item that is not available anywhere else. Target has exclusive rites to the B-Wing vehicle. Shoppers will be attracted by this exclusive and during their shopping they will purchase other items whilst they are at this store, even though the other items are available at other retailers. TRU does the same with the their exclusive TIE Intercepter. Now, because Hasbro has produced an exclusive for one customer, they must offer an exclusive to other customers, if they (the customer) so desire, as to not outcast any one particular buyer. As for who is to blame, don't shake your finger at Hasbro. One finger away from a peace sign. Scott