Chalmun's Cantina's 5th Anniversary Posted by: Big_E 04.05.06 12:01am The traditional gift for a 5th anniversary is the gift of wood. With that in mind three frequent patrons of Chalmun's Cantina got together to present the owner with a new bar in celebration of this wonderful day. Having blasted, lightsabered and generally worn out the original plasteel bar, Greedo, Hammerhead and Walrusman had a new one handcrafted from a wroshyr tree, native to Chalmun's home planet Kashyyyk.
Dedicated in a ceremony that brought patrons, old and new, from around the galaxy, the new bar is not only beautiful but guaranteed to make the Cantina the talk of Mos Eisley. Seen over the weekend in pre-anniversary festivities, Boba Fett nodded his approval when asked about the bar. "It hasn't even seen its first disintegration," mumbled Mr. Fett through his helmet's communicator. With Greeata on his arm and his pal Dengar in the next booth, Fett appeared to be mostly on the lookout for bounty as he kept referring to his data pad as each new patron entered the bar.
Several smugglers, who are rumored to have helped in obtaining the wroshyr wood, sat around the bar remembering the good times before the fall of the Empire. Djas Puhr, who hasn't been in these parts since a ruckus between Walrusman and an old desert hermit left the previous bar singed, was seen with several others of his species having one of Wuher's finest draughts. Celebrities like the Tonnika Sisters also made an appearance before heading off to an after hours party at Gardulla the Hutt's place.
Rumored to be in attendance along with the regular scum and villainy was Luke Skywalker who was visiting family in the Dune Sea. Although he'd be high on the list for most of the bounty hunters, the local Stormtrooper office didn't appear worried. "All the bounty hunters know they'd have to kill each other first to get at Skywalker so I think they'll just let it slide. But I'd be on alert when I made my break for space after my vacation," said Sergeant TK-1138.
Although Kashyyyk First protesters originally tried to stop the export of the wroshyr tree for the bar, rumors in the cantina are that Talon Karrde himself provided forged papers to get it off planet. Ugnaught craftsmen did most of the construction at Cloud City and the final touches and polishing were done by Jawas and pit droids from Watto's. "It's truly a celebration of Chalmun's and a tribute to the unique drinks Wuher serves every day," stated Oznemoc, Chalmun's bar boy.
The festivities are to culminate in a Sabacc tournament and ribbon cutting ceremony on Wednesday.
CC.com brings new meaning to 'Drinking Games' with The Cantina Collectible Card Game Posted by: Tresob Yr 04.05.06 12:01am Relive all the excitement and hi-jinx of The Cantina Comic in parody card game form!
What? A parody Star Wars CCG? After five years of living on the cutting edge of Star Wars humor, is the CreatureCantina just a Johnny-come-lately when it comes to the whole gaming scene? Not a jot, sirrah! We know that miniatures are in and that Star Wars CCG's are on their way out...but have you ever tried downloading a set of plastic miniatures and printing them at work for free? Not a pretty sight, my friends. Not a pretty sight at all. So the CantinaCCG it is!
But what is the nature of this perfectly crapulous game of chance?
Designed to be playable by hyper-intelligent Yu-Gi-Oh-addicted third graders during recess or inebriated members of campus Hellenistic societies during dormitory quiet hours, the CantinaCCG is elegant in its simplicity yet furious in its pace. Players draw cards of nefarious Cantina patrons and arm them with lethal weapons to acquire the most covetous prize in all of Tatooine: memory-cleansing booze. To win the booze, you will pit patrons against each other in all out bar fights and high stakes bounty hunts. The player with the most booze points when the tap runs dry wins. It's a game of chance, quick wits, and skill.
More devious yet, once you have finished printing your cards and making your girlfriend and/or mother cut them out for you, you can begin your hunt for exclusive chase cards that have been strewn across some of the most popular Star Wars fan sites in the galaxy. If you don't want to download them for their insanely powerful abilities, then you'll want to do it because you are a compulsive collector and can't help it.
All of the cards feature Bill Cable's original art in the style of The Cantina comic, and three spectacular cardbacks created exclusively for the game!
Here is this week's set of six basic CantinaCCG cards!
And finally, here are the play instructions. You might want to wait a few weeks to build up a more balanced deck before you play. The exclusive cards have some fairly powerful abilities, so playing with all exclusives might be a bit wonky. But if you want to try now, nobody's stopping you!
Five years in the wretched hive! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.05.06 12:01am Can you believe it? Five years of Star Wars humor in the can? That tremendous volume of work leads me to a very peculiar quandary... what can I say to commemorate such a milestone that hasn't already been said?
I mean, I don't want to go all sappy on you. One temptation is to go through all the events we've shared together. It gives the sense of a shared history and of accomplishment. But it's not very funny. That's more the type of thing to get everybody all watery-eyed. AND I PROMISED MYSELF I WOULDN'T CRY!!!
So I gotta go another route. There's the other temptation to gloat about how we've outlasted a certain other web site... and yeah, that would be funny. But that's kind of petty in light of the fact that a bazillion people are going to read this today since every Star Wars news site on God's green earth is gonna be linking to us. So I gotta take the high road. The rest of my staff is tackling the collecting issues of the day. So that's out. Don't want to be redundant. Man... this is much harder than I expected!
I've got it! Ah yes... this is perfect. I'll tell a story; a story of a tragic occurrence that occurred this past weekend. On Saturday about a dozen members attended our monthly PSWCS meeting. This month's was in Lancaster, PA. The meetings are always a blast... games and food... but the highlight is almost always the Show & Tell session. And I had some dandy C-3PO items to show and tell. I passed around this toy claw in C-3PO packaging, and a Vintage 80's era newspaper coupon circular with a $.25 C-3POs Cereal coupon, and a rubber Polish C-3PO bootleg.
Then I pulled out my ultimate piece. I gently cradled the bubble-wrapped bundle, and slowly unwrapped two halves of a spectacularly rare item - the ceramic molds used to create the very Polish bootleg I'd just passed around! I began to describe the story of how I obtained them, and how they'd set me back quite a substantial sum. I moved forward towards the meeting's host, so he could snap a photo of them. But when the flash went off, I stumbled, and the molds shattered on the basement floor!! I looked back at the ruins of my grail collectible. The room was completely silent, and the silence lingered for long moments. I looked around at the horror in the eyes of everybody around me. The host was trembling. And then, a slow grin spread across my lips. Because they weren't thinking about how that day was a special day. I spun around, pointed at everyone and yelled "April Fools!!!" And hysterical laughter erupted all around the room.
You see, the "molds" were actually plaster casts I'd made the day before. It was the greatest gag I've ever pulled off! It was even funnier than how I conned 10 different Star Wars web sites into hosting the PDF files of a CCG game that doesn't really exist... Just kidding! The CCG game is real. That's the big thing we're doing this week to celebrate 5 years of tomfoolery. You can read the details of that below.
You know, I've really cherished the five years I've spent here. Thanks to all the readers who have stuck with us and supported us! Hopefully we'll be around for another five years, making you laugh and cringe, week in and week out.
The IceCreamMan Cometh Posted by: Bill Cable 04.12.06 12:01am Yes, I know I've been introducing new characters into the Cantina left and right these past few weeks. When I realized this was the last week to vote for Willrow Hood I figured if I wanted to do this I had to do it NOW! So here's my effort to show just how much fun it could be to introduce a Willrow figure into your Creature Cantina diorama. Imagine the possibilities with this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Let's do something good for a change! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.12.06 12:01am It's not often we have the chance here to plug something worthwhile. Usually I'm just trying to fatten my own wallet, not help out anybody else. I suppose if I want to avoid the fires of Hell I need to do something selfless every once in a while. One link to a charity thing makes up for years of unwholesome filth, right?? Let's hope...
This guy named Trevor is hosting some Star Wars auctions to raise money for "Relay for Life." The auctions go live tonight (assuming you're a faithful CC.com reader and check this site out every Wednesday). You can check them out by visiting www.trevortaylor.com/starwarsauction. Bid high and bid often!!
Every Kilobyte Counts Posted by: Tresob Yr 04.12.06 12:01am After last week's fateful crash, I decided to modify my comic's format so as not to unnecessarily burden the server.
Last chance to VOTE FOR WILLROW! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.12.06 12:01am Unless I'm mistaken (given my current mental state, that isn't entirely improbable) the last day to vote in the Toyfare Fan Choice Vote is Saturday! That means you only have a few more days left to cast a meaningful ballot for the galaxy's favorite Tibanna Gas Miner!
Time for me to run around the office and cast a vote on all 200 different computers...
Now, I've tried a few different methods to convince you to vote for Willrow. I've appealed to your sense of pragmatism. It only makes sense to vote for a character that won't otherwise be made... for which this could be his only chance! I've appealed to your sense of humor. What could be more fun than a Willrow figure? Nothing, I tell you! And I've appealed to your sense of taste. Mmmmmmmm Ice Cream.
But I haven't yet appealed to your sense of justice! And I tell you, if you care about justice and fairness then you must VOTE FOR WILLROW! Look at the list of candidates. What do you see? A WHOLE LOT OF WHITE PEOPLE! Yeah, there's a few droids and aliens, but the humans are all white! All except one. It's high time we elected a person of color to be our Fan Choice! So unless you're an evil, racist bigot, you must VOTE FOR WILLROW!
I wonder if there's a race card in the CantinaCCG...
Cantina Shuttered After All Night Kegger Posted by: Big_E 04.12.06 12:01am Celebrations of the Cantina's 5th Anniversary got out of hand in the early hours last Wednesday morning.
Apparently several patrons began firing off blasters as the last keg kicked. Oznemoc, who had long passed out, had turned his duties over to an ASP-7 droid earlier in the night. As ASP-7 came to collect the keg it only served as a moving target. Greedo, known for his dubious marksmanship, singed the hair on a Talz before knocking out Doikk Na'ts' Fizzz.
The ensuing ruckus destroyed tables, lights and the droid detector at the door. Luckily, Chalmun's new wroshyr bar escaped without a nick.
Unfortunately, further celebrations scheduled for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday had to be canceled while the Cantina was cleaned up.
Many Mos Eisley residents were upset upon finding the cantina closed.
"Squizzzz, *click*, brzzz gort," stated Garindan!
The Cantina was open for small crowds on Friday night. Much of Wuher's liquor stock was depleted but word is BoSheck will be jumping in-system with new stock over the weekend.
The Cantina should be open for regular hours by the writing of this article.
Free deck-building materials at CC.com! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.12.06 12:01am And here you thought you had to go to Home Depot and PAY for decking materials! Of course, should you use CreatureCantina.com's supplies, you'd quite literally be building your house of cards. Ha!!
Anyway... I'm sure many of you are here to collect your weekly bounty of CantinaCCG cards. I hope you had luck in finding last week's set of 10 exclusive cards from the various collecting news sites that hosted them. There were a few tricky ones in there... you may need to network with your friends to find them all. Nothing like a good hunt though, right?
This week we're again pushing the weapons and booze to help balance out your deck. You probably have enough characters for a good game, even though those characters might all have freakish abilities. This will give you more things to fight with and fight over. And be sure to check back next week and every week for another set! We're still working on new cards as we speak!
Here is this week's set of six basic CantinaCCG cards!
My nightmare scenario Posted by: Bill Cable 04.12.06 12:01am Last week was very difficult for me. Let me paint a picture for you. Let's say you spent months planning for a big event. You had a really big plan, a fun promotion, and you bounced numerous E-mails off of dozens of different people to make sure the promotion goes off without a hitch. You spend weeks working on logistics, and countless (and I mean countless) hours lining up all the materials to make sure everything's ready. You spend many more hours motivating your staff, who themselves have sunk in many sleepless nights to be sure everything is prepared. You spend from dusk until dawn on the days leading up to the event finishing up all the little projects, until everything is perfect. The day comes when all this planning is supposed to pay off... the work will come to fruition... and by 8am everything you'd planned is instantly, irreparably destroyed.
At 10am, you're told by some data farm tech that a diagnostic would be finished in 20 minutes, and everything should be fine within an hour. At noon, you're told it'd be another hour or two. At 5pm, you're told it should be up and running that night. At 10pm, you're told it'll be ready by the time you wake up. That's an entire day of constant aggravation, not to mention stress over not being able to access E-mail. And God do I crave my E-mail...
These assurances continue through the first half of the next day, until you're told the server is fried, and it'll be a day or so until the new one is built. Then it's just a waiting game, wondering if you'll see anything live all weekend. Wondering if everybody hates you for the dead links they've been clicking from a dozen different Star Wars collecting sites. Dead links you yourself had been clicking every 10 minutes the previous day.
That's what last week was like for me. And my God it was HELL! I mean, I was at the brink of despair. All that work and planning... all for naught. Such a huge opportunity wasted! I was thoroughly depressed. When the server came back up Friday, I started working out plans to salvage a bit of the 5th Anniversary celebration. I contacted all the sites who were carrying their exclusive CCG cards and they all graciously agreed to post an update on Monday. So everything ended up not being totally lost. But man... it was tough going for a while there.
I suppose one could conclude that it was a 5th Anniversary update befitting a site that SUCKS like none other!
Well, I'm off to pop a few more Tums to treat these new ulcers, and to slather my head with Rogaine to replace all the hair I pulled out.
Actual character development! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.19.06 12:01am I've been doing this Cantina comic for a while now, but something has recently begun to trouble me. Most of the characters in the strip are pretty true to their on-screen persona. Greedo is an incompetent putz. Walrusman is a rabble-rouser. Wuher is surly. But then there's Hammerhead. He's pretty much the polar opposite of his EU persona. Why is that?? Find out in this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Good Grievous Posted by: Tresob Yr 04.19.06 12:01am Because knock-knock jokes never get old...
At long last: All-Con photos! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.19.06 12:01am As I told you when I first revealed them, the drawings of Barriss Offee and Captain Typho were given as gifts at this year's All-Con Convention to the actors who played the two characters. Here they are again, just in case you forget how pretty they are.
After much badgering, I finally got Todd Carlton (All-Con promoter and Star Wars Super Collector's Wish Book author) to send me some photos of the glorious gift-giving. He sent them last week. And while neither of these guys look as thrilled as Gerald Home did when he received his Squidhead drawing, they still look mighty happy. So I thought I'd share them...
So there you go - two more satisfied customers! Well, not really "customers" since they didn't pay for them... Sounds kinda lame to say "two more happy recipients" since who wouldn't be happy to receive some free Cable Original art? Ahhh... I have it! So there you go - two more proud "Cable Original" artwork owners!
New CantinaCCG Downloadable Cards Posted by: Tresob Yr 04.19.06 12:01am This week, we present a favorite regular and an optical oddity: Hammerhead and Myo. With this wall-eyed Ithorian and myopic Abyssian in your deck, your opponent is bound to end up cross-eyed...
Hammerhead's not looking for a fight, but his whopping 7 Strength means he's ready to defend his drink against some of the toughest competitors out there. You'll definitely want to max out on his card in your deck. Myo can hold his own against most patron's with his respectable 5 Strength, but he'll probably do best if armed.
And remember, ten other Websites are still hosting exclusive, high-powered CantinaCCG patrons! If you haven't found them all yet, here's a list of the sites (in alphabetical order):
A question of etiquette Posted by: Bill Cable 04.26.06 12:01am There are certain situations where having a protocol droid around to let you know what to do would be very useful. Times when you might be going over the line of acceptable conduct and not realizing it. Today's comic explores one of those situations. Check it out in this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Satisfaction Guaranteed Posted by: Tresob Yr 04.26.06 12:01am Without new films to drive the collectibles market, future special editions of Star Wars movies will include new footage to promote the franchise's many licensees...
Under Construction! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.26.06 12:01am We've had some... issues the past couple weeks. Violating some policies in regard to some... things... that we're not allowed to mention otherwise we'd again be violating those previously-mentioned policies. Anyway... as a result the News Archive is all screwed up. Expect it to be fully up-and-running by next week.
More CantinaCCG goodness! Posted by: Tresob Yr 04.26.06 12:01am This week features ol' "W" himself...
WUHER!
And if there's one thing Wuher does better than serving drinks, it's stealing them away from patrons! Just win the first barfight with Wuher, and he'll take all the other booze cards in play.
Oh, yeah, and then there's Hem Dazon.
He doesn't really do anything special.
He gets lonely on the weekends sometimes.
It's sad for him.
Anyway, make sure to download a Corellian Spice Ale, a Fizzbrew, a Blaster Pistol, and a Jawa Disrupter to round out your booze and weapons decks.
We've also created a page on the site with links to ALL the CantinaCCG cards. Find the ones you missed over here.
Spectacular new Cable Original Art!! Posted by: Bill Cable 04.26.06 12:01am Every once in a while I get a "Cable Original" commission that really whets my appetite. An idea that makes me want to skip over a bunch of other drawings so I can do it right away. This week's new art is one such idea.
About a year ago I was approached about doing Obi-Wan and Vader from their Mustafar duel. I get people all the time who want multiple-character scenes, but it's rare that somebody is actually willing to pay for each character in the scene as an individual piece. So I rarely get the chance to draw two interactive characters. And I've never had the chance to do two characters that can be shown together so dynamically. As soon as the guy approved two drawings, I had an image in my head exactly how it would look. And I was able to capture that vision almost exactly. Check out Vader and Obi-Wan:
Now, you'll notice when you click on them that it takes you to a new page. This page displays the two drawings as I expect them to be framed and hung on the wall. I laid out the art such that it should be displayed catty-corner, not side-by-side. That lends itself to a much more dynamic interplay between the two drawings, and also depicts the scene as it was in the films. I just can't express just how happy I am with how these two drawings turned out. They've left me re-energized to dive into more art. So expect some new Cable Originals in the coming weeks. I feel as if I've hit my stride again!
Calling it like it is! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.03.06 12:01am You can always count on your friends here at CreatureCantina.com to be completely honest with you (when we're not lying to you because it's funny). Check out how we continue our policy of candidness in this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Birds of a feather Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.03.06 12:01am This week, we continue our tribute to those pint-size warriors, the Galactic Heroes. Those fellas really know how to make inter-stellar warfare and devastation as cute as can be!
CC.com cracks under pressure! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.03.06 12:01am From time to time, various sites ask us for a link exchange. I never really wanted the effort of maintaining a links page. Besides, nobody visits links pages anyway. So all I've ever done is the little "People We Love" deal on the right there. Those are the sites to which current and former CC.com contributors have a connection.
Recently we've been getting a slew of requests, so I've decided to relent. I mean what the hell? A site goes belly up, and we got a dead link. No biggie. And maybe it'll help bump up our Google status. So, if you want to exchange a link, drop me a line. And visit our new links page!
The CantinaCCG Update Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.03.06 12:01am We went with a Big and Small update this week, presenting that lovable, huggable arachnid Muftak and that classic alien with the distinctive tooth, Snaggletooth.
Muftak is going to provide you with some heavy cover, boasting an impressive 8 strength (and you'll want to give him the new Gamorrean Axe with its bonus to already strong characters). The diminutive Snaggletooth, though, isn't exactly the barbrawl type. He doesn't even have any special powers. What were we thinking? It's Snaggletooth! We should have thrown him some kind of bone. But decisions had to be made. And we're deciders. At the very least, he has a slight advantage if attacked with our other new weapon, the difficult to pronounce gaderiffi stick, whose variable power depends on the strength of the opponent being attacked.
And on the table, we also have two new drinks, the effeminate Cassandra Brandy and the potent Old Janx Spirit (with a bonus to lightsaber users).
(Incidentally, we've started using the very helpful Halagad's very useful list of Star Wars drinks that he's posted at http://blogs.starwars.com/abelgpena/23 )
Send us some feedback!
OK... Here is this week's set of six basic CantinaCCG cards!
We've also created a page on the site with links to ALL the CantinaCCG cards. Find the ones you missed over here.
Introducing the new "Guns for Collectors" program Posted by: Steve "Solo" Rensi 05.03.06 12:01am There seems to be a lot of useless bitching lately on the state of Star Wars collecting. As usual collectors are attacking and blaming Hasbro for everything. I'm surprised they haven't been accused of global warming and high gas prices yet. But I'll admit things are getting rough out there for collectors. I sometime feel I have a better chance finding Jimmy Hofa in the toy aisle than new figures. Completists are going nuts over these Ultimate Galactic Hunt figures (side note: i still believe completists are nuts to begin with for forgetting these are toys to be played with). People are taking proof-of-purchases off of Vintage Saga Trilogy Collection figures to get the exclusive George Lucas. Everyone and their sister is looking for Scorch (another side note: I have one, HAHA!). Fist fights are breaking out in the toy aisle. And on top of this all, scalpers still roam and people who have fully jumped on the bitch wagon still buy from them.
Well I have a solution to all of this: Start issuing guns to collectors. Open season will be declared on scalpers (no tags and no bag limit). You want that Ultimate Galactic Hunt Han Solo with the variant force pike with the number 3 printing on it with the rare Luke Skywalker hologram figure, well damn it you're going to have to shoot someone. This program should be beneficial to the entire collecting community. Scalpers will be killed in record numbers, and the overall collecting community would shrink, meaning more toys for the survivors. Also the economy will flourish as retailers will have to hire more clean up guys to mop up the blood and fix the bullet holes. Everyone wins... except those that get shot.
The Pennsylvania Star Wars Collecting Society will be forming a special Task Force to hunt down scalpers and abusive collectors and those who bitch and whine to their wives because they didn't get a UGH figure.
So go out and start collecting care free again and remember; squeeze, don't pull, the trigger.
Some "Amazing" new Cable Original art!! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.03.06 12:01am Look at this... when given the choice between leading with my newest art or my eBay auctions, I went with the auctions. And it's a damn shame, too... this latest art is FANTASTIC! I mean, it's a primo piece! One of the best! I suppose my lust for fortune trumps my lust for glory.
My latest subject is the military mastermind of the Rebellion - Admiral Ackbar! And I'm thrilled with just how nice he turned out. But not quite as thrilled as the guy who bought it was:
Hey Bill,
I received the Ackbar today and I am just blown away. It's amazing. I just can't believe how perfect it is. I also can't even think about how much effort went into this piece. I am ecstatic right now. Thank you sooooo much!!!
- (random payment questions snipped) -
Thanks again for this once in a lifetime opportunity to add a beautiful piece to my Ackbar collection!!!!!
-Matt
Man, I love that level of enthusiasm! Nothing makes me feel better. Check that... nothing I do alone. Check that... nothing that I do alone that doesn't involve lubricant...
THIS THREAD IS CLOSED Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.03.06 12:01am Have you ever posted an idea in an online Star Wars fan site forum, only to discover that your post (if not the whole thread) has suddenly disappeared?
Ever spark or jump into in an interesting debate, only to find out that the thread has been locked because someone went off topic?
Ever get the feeling that maybe you've been misunderstood?
If so...then click below, and find out the truth behind online forums!
Holy Cow that's a lot of Vintage! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.03.06 12:01am Every once in a while an opportunity falls into your lap. Mine fell in mid-March. I received a random E-mail from a guy in Florida looking to sell a Vintage collection. I get those from time to time, being the Webmaster here and the President of PSWCS gives me some level of visibility when people Google for Star Wars. I was actually extremely fortunate to read the E-mail, because it was initially tagged as SPAM. I do periodic searches of my spam for "wars" in the hopes I'll turn up any relevant tagged mail. I guess fate wanted me to read it.
So this guy is selling a collection. Turns out the collection is 100+ figures. And it turns out they're ALL still MOC. About this time I had to remind myself to breathe. But the bad news - he already received an offer from somebody. And it was more than the collection would justify. So I reply that unfortunately I couldn't match that price, but if the other deal fell through to contact me. Then, magically, the other deal fell through... something about requiring ALL the figures to be sent BEFORE the buyer sent payment. Ridiculous.
So I have this collection at my fingertips, but the money the guy wants is too much for me to finance. So I turn to one of my oldest Vintage buddies - Chris Fawcett of 12Back.com. I'd helped him track down some Kenner employees, and he buys collections all the time, so I knew he'd be into the deal. We priced out the collection and sent the guy our offer. He accepts. A large check sent in pure faith later, and a big box arrives at my house from UPS. In it, the first of four shipments of 25-30 figures!
Now, you don't buy collections like this to keep them... not on my salary at least. I paid more for this collection than I put down on my first house! That's not throwin' away money, that's investin' money! In the hopes of recovering our money, and hopefully earning a paltry little profit, we're selling these suckers on eBay!! Check these out:
Now, I'll be the first to admit that each of these items has some condition issue with it. If it didn't, it'd be on its way to AFA by now. And a number of the figures from this collection will end up at AFA after I go through them all. But overall most of the ones now available would display nice. Some of them are actually quite rare. Legitimately rare, not eBay "RARE." And worst case, for the most damaged ones, you could ship them off to AFA to get some minty uncirculated loose graded figures! Have you seen what AFAU figures are going for on eBay?? It's a madhouse! Not that I'd ever condone opening MOC figures to get loose mint ones... but that's something to consider.
As I said, I have a lot of money sunk into this deal. So I hope you'll bid. Dive into Vintage - it's a wonderful pursuit! And women love it. You'll be getting some 5 nights a week if you add one of these Vintage MOC figures to your collection!
An allegory for... something Posted by: Bill Cable 05.10.06 12:01am The themes presented in this week's comic can be applied to so many varied aspects of life... I almost feel like a philosopher writing it. It'll connect with everyone on bunches of different levels. Destined to be another classic, it's this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
New apprentice Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.10.06 12:01am Order 66 has been carried out, and only Yoda and Obi-wan are left to confront the Sith. What Yoda doesn't know, however, is that Darth Sidious has violated a treasured Sith protocol...more than two, there are!
Thanks for bidding! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.10.06 12:01am Last week I plugged a bunch of auctions. They ended Sunday, and they did really well! These were really the dogs of the collection we're selling, and the average price was only slightly lower than what we need to make overall to turn a profit! The power of advertising on CreatureCantina.com is demonstrated yet again!! I'll be listing another batch of figures again this Sunday, so be sure to check out My eBay Page again in a few days!
Who is USCWannabe? Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.10.06 12:01am Wanting to keep its readers well informed with unbiased news on presidential candidates, Creature Cantina trolled the Internet looking for dirt...er...helpful information...on the presidential leader, uscwannabe.
Stormtroopers invade Exeter, PA! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.10.06 12:01am This past weekend was Free Comic Book Day. To celebrate, the troopers of Garrison Carida invaded a little comic shop called Essential Comics in a little place called Exeter, Pennsylvania. They terrified the locals and chased little children around... enslaved all the Wookiees and caused the sort of ruckus you'd expect from a bunch of guys named "Stormtroopers." While in the process of imposing the will of the Empire, they took a few breaks to take some photos for their favorite Star Wars Comedy site. Enjoy!
This week's CantinaCCG Booster Pack Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.10.06 12:01am While the patrons are pretty much just roster-filler and cannon fodder, this week's weapons and booze cards can definitely tilt the direction of any given game.
At the bar, our patrons include Lak Sivrak and Feltipern, two generic patrons just taking up space.
On tap, we have the specially-brewed Daranu, which wins you two bonus booze cards if acquired during the barfight. Look out, though! Somebody has smuggled in the dastardly Yoda Bong...and that spells trouble with a capital B...or maybe a Y...Win this thing, and you're poor little alien critters will be so wasted that you actually LOSE booze points.
In the armaments department, we have a handy (and reusable) Biker Scout Pistol. It doesn't do much damage, but you can pass it around during a barfight. And last, but most certainly not least, the dreaded Technological Terror itself arrives from deep space: THE DEATH STAR! While this orb of destruction won't win you any booze during a fight, it is a great way to stick it to your opponent by permanently removing cards from play for the duration of the game.
Just in case you've missed a card, find the entire deck right here.
The man who would be king Fan Club President Posted by: Bill Cable 05.10.06 12:01am I'm talking with Dustin Roberts, who's trying to win the Hyperspace Fan Club President contest on StarWars.com. Dustin is currently in second place in the contest, or as I like to call it, he's the first loser. With less than a week left in the contest, Dustin is scraping the bottom of the barrel for publicity, which brings him to CreatureCantina.com.
BC: Now Dustin, I've read many of the posts you've written about why you should be elected Fan Club president. You talk about your service to the collecting community, your involvement in OSWCC, and all sorts of other things. But really, the "presidency" to which you aspire is an honorary title, where you won't have any influence over anything. You won't run the fan club, and won't be able to do anything to help the average collector. You'll just get a free trip to San Diego and your picture in the Insider. So why should people support you and fork over their money to subscribe to Hyperspace/SW Insider so you can win a bunch of prizes? Why you and not, I don't know, some kid with Malaria?
DR: Bill it's safe to say that anyone with Malaria would be just too sick to ride in the bullet proof car waving to all the Star Wars fans in the grand parade that's sure to take place when I win! As for the prizes, I plan to give them away in a special 3 month celebratory wrap party that will span three continents, ten time zones and a whole lot of *free swag for all my supporters! ( *residents of Pennsylvania not included)
BC: You've been, at times, heavy-handed as an administrator in the RebelScum forums. At times you've declared, almost gleefully, that it's Dustin's way or the highway. Do you think being a prick in those instances is coming back to bite you in the ass now?
And another comic... Posted by: Bill Cable 05.17.06 12:01am What can I say... this guy Dan has some funny ideas. Read another in this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Momma... Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.17.06 12:01am Delayed by intergalactic war, a few clones made it home a little late for mother's day...
Get this week's CantinaCCG booster cards! Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.17.06 12:01am Two cards enter, one card leaves!
Two cards enter, one card leaves!
This week, we present an intergalactic sultan of swing: the Bith musician. His tunes are so catchy, he'll distract your opponent's cards in a barfight with his handy ability.
And making a speedy exit across the floor is none other than everyone's least favorite party-crasher, the self-righteous and garrulous goldenrod himself, C-3PO.
3PO doesn't offer much to the game at the moment.
Really, he's just a liability. But he's a funny liability.
So don't be one of those insecure and uptight gamers who has to win all the time or else he'll pack up hs cards and go home to whine to his his MMORPG friends.
Be a man.
Put 3PO in your deck.
Real men embrace loserdome.
Holy Cow that's a whole lot more Vintage! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.17.06 12:01am Advertising my first batch of auctions was so successful, I can't help but do it again! I've already heard from some satisfied customers from my first batch of auctions. How's this for glowing feedback: "Fast shipment, great item. Thanks." That just instills a sense of confidence in a seller, doesn't it? Or how about this one: Fast shipping, good contact and everything ok. If that doesn't motivate you to trust me, nothing will!
As president of PSWCS, I've had the opportunity to introduce a lot of collectors to Vintage. And it's always been a very positive experience. Modern people invariably approach Vintage with a high level of apprehension. I felt the same way not too many years ago, so I can relate. MOC Vintage just seems so expensive! When you're used to spending $7 on a figure, paying $40 or more for one just doesn't seem to make sense. But once you dive into Vintage, you'll understand that it's money much better spent! You'll genuinely cherish each new Vintage item you purchase. When was the last time you cherished a modern toy you found at Target?
With modern, it's more a feeling of relief that the latest hole has been filled. It's a feeling of accomplishment, but I don't think I've ever felt the same joy as I feel when I get a new Vintage figure. I'm now 7 figures away from a complete set of 96 MOC figures, and feeling the joy of Vintage 91 times already (not even counting all the 3POs), I can tell you it gets sweeter with each new purchase.
But for your first Vintage purchase, I recommend you take baby steps. It takes a while to develop a focus... to decide what you really like. My first Vintage purchase (not counting when I was 5 years old) was a ROTJ Leia in Boushh disguise. So the figures listed below would make for a perfect first step into the Vintage realm! None of them are super mint or particularly rare, so most of them won't end up costing an arm or a leg. It's a great, affordable way to get a taste of Vintage. And whichever one you win, it'll be something you cherish, rather than something you're happy to get behind you.
Vote for Dustin SithVixen! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.17.06 12:01am For President of the Star Wars Fan Club, CreatureCantina.com would like to officially endorse a true Star Wars fan and our good friend: Dustin Rob... huh? That contest is over? You're kidding. Oh well...
Luckily, there's another good contest for us Star Wars fans to vote in. This one's a little more fun, though. If you attended Celebration 3, you almost certainly caught sight of one costumer who goes by the handle "SithVixen." She's was a Femtrooper... one of the hottest ones. You'll remember her when you see her. Well, now she's competing in an on-line swimsuit competition. And we urge you to visit the site and Vote for SithVixen!
I know what you're thinking... "I don't want to go to some random web site and look at women in skimpy lingerie... not even to support a fellow Star Wars fan." I hope you'll reconsider! The photos of SithVixen alone make it worth the effort! And I think she has a good shot at winning... quite a few of the women there look like body builders rather than models... and somewhat beastly body builders at that. But there is a good selection of hotties as well to make it worth your time. Just be sure you vote for SithVixen while you're surfing.
Cantina Comic Posted by: Bill Cable 05.24.06 12:01am OK... I'll admit it... right now I'm in full-on PSWCS Summer Social planning mode. So my mind's not on this site. But I have a commitment to the comic, so I did the comic. And I came up with something pretty funny, I think. You be the judge when you check out this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Checklist Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.24.06 12:01am As any Empire-at-War player knows, pan-Galactic warfare can really be a logistical nightmare and General Kenobi is about to find this out from first-hand experience.
Help Wanted! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.24.06 12:01am Creative? Funny? Masochistic? Then do we have the job for you!
If you haven't noticed, it's been a bit slow here lately. If not for Tresob's weekly contributions, I'd basically be here doing this by my lonesome. I guess with the lull between the last movie and the first TV show, a lot of the enthusiasm has drained from the staff.
But maybe you're still full of it! And we're always looking for people who are full of it! So if you crave the notoriety of writing for the Internet's #1 Star Wars humor web site, and don't care that you'll never be paid for it, E-mail me a few sample articles or images! If they're even slightly good you'll be on the staff. Honestly. We're scraping the bottom of the barrel here, people!
New CantinaCCG Booster Card! Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.24.06 12:01am This week, we are only posting one booster card. This isn't because we only had time to create one card. Obviously, we wouldn't short change our readers like that. No, rest assured we have many, many cards still to come in our ever-expanding and fully-playable collectible card game parody.
We wanted to take a moment to spotlight a very special individual in the Star Wars Universe: a character so significant to the lore and mythos, that he deserved the spotlight to shine on him and him alone...
Yes, tonight's update features the highly-coveted WILLROW HOOD, the Ice-cream Machine man, card.
Download. Print. Enjoy.
And keep sending those questions, comments, and typographical corrections to tresob.yr@gmail.com.
Comic Posted by: Bill Cable 05.31.06 12:01am Still in PSWCS Social prep mode. Sorry to the staff if I forgot any stories they sent. I'm scrambling here. I'm at my wit's end. So choke on this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
Envy, thy name is Baldy! Posted by: Baldy 05.31.06 12:01am From your front page: " We're scraping the bottom of the barrel here, people! "
I thought *I* was the bottom of the barrel ! Just because I have no real talent or drive anymore shouldn't mean you can just go and throw me away. Sniff, I thought we were...... friends. :(
Baldy
PS. I hate you and your site. Good thing many people we both know have made it clear that I am not allowed to damage you at DC this year. It seems your role as "The Chosen One" keeps you safe from injury...... for now.
PPS. Can you send me any extra trading cards you have laying around? I lost my Drunken Stupor Card and need it to have a chance at making a dent in the CCG game. Thanks pal!
Rho Iota Delta Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.31.06 12:01am Some Star Wars figures have found adjusting to the Transformers universe to be a little awkward at times...
More new CantinaCCG booster cards Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.31.06 12:01am The Techie and the Nerd
This weeks booster cards feature two recent additions to cast of "The Cantina," the cuddly co-pilot from Kashyyyk and trivia-totin' rebel Major: Chewbacca and Derlin!
Chewie is a pretty heavy-hitter in his own right, but put any weapon in his hand, and he gets a whopping +4 to his total strength in addition to the weapon modifier. Sometimes its better to let the Wookiee win.
Derlin, meanwhile, likes to use brains over brawn and gets a +2 bonus whenever he does NOT use a weapon.
New podracing track a failure Posted by: Darth Danno 05.31.06 12:01am I don't know who had the bright idea to put a podracing track on Hoth. What were they thinking?
Of the 16 pods scheduled to race, 8 couldn't even get started. 3 froze up within the first mile. One couldn't even find his pod before the race as it was painted white and blended perfectly into the environment.One was doing quite well until he hit a snowstorm, lost all visibility, and ran into a wampa of all things. The wampa was fine, but the pod became undrivable and the racer became dinner for the wampa.
Another racer got lost and is still out there...somewhere. They sent a rescue team out, then a few hours thereafter, sent another rescue team to find the first rescue team who reported back they had become hopelessly lost. To date. neither the driver, nor either of the teams have been found. Yet another pod went out a few miles, lost all sense of direction, got completely turned around, and ended up going back the way he came, only to collide with the last remaining racer. There were no survivors. Hopefully next month's race will go better, I mean, what kind of obstacles could a podracer encounter on Endor?
New blood! Posted by: Bill Cable 05.31.06 12:01am Check it out... somebody actually responded to our "Help Wanted" article last week! We're proud to welcome "Darth Danno" to the CreatureCantina.com fold! Prepare to laugh out loud! Well... maybe chuckle under your breath...
Five most disturbing Star Wars figure features Posted by: Tresob Yr 05.31.06 12:01am I assume that, as desirable as the job may seem, being a Star Wars Action Figure Sculptor is a lonely life. This isn't based on some kind of prejudice or stereotype against men who spend their lives carving out toys for a living.
Rather, I have come to this conclusion through careful inspection of my action figure collection.
If you think Disney has trouble with animators hiding weird little perverted Easter eggs in their movies, wait until you check out what's up at Hasbro...
