Jedi Padawan - FIVE POINTS!!!
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 07.16.03 12:01am
While vacationing in the Great Oasis of Tatooine, Crime Lord Jabba the Hutt loves nothing more than to get behind the wheel of an old beat up landspeeder and hunt down would be Jedi. CC.com was able to obtain exclusive pictures of this barbaric sport by infiltrating Jabba's lair posing as a Skiff Guard.

Be warned, the following pictures are truly shocking!

First, the would be Jedi is captured and subdued by copious amounts of pork rinds and malt liquor. He's then dressed up like a NASCAR season ticket holder and left alone and defenseless in a sea of sand dunes while Jabba begins the hunt.

When Jabba spots his quarry, he moves in for the kill. Usually the Jedi in training is still in a drunken stupor and becomes road kill, but on this day the tables are turned! Our underdog Jedi summons the Force (along with what looks like a strong love for pie) and nimbly springs over the speeding vehicle.

Remembering rodeos from days gone by, the portly Padawan metaphorically hog ties the hapless Hutt's vehicle by filling the landspeeder with a white, trashy substance... slowing it down to a halt. Our hero then finishes off his opponent by slipping "Jim Neighbor's Greatest Hits" into the Eight-Track Player and letting Jabba drift off into a glassy-eyed haze.

With the danger behind him, the would be Jedi hot wires the Crime Lord's sweetest ride and drives off into the sunset. Pimpadelic!

It is rumored that the newly knighted Jedi will be reliving his encounter by jumping several vehicles at DragonCon in Atlanta to raise money for his somewhat troubling porno habit. He may even dress as Princess Leia Organa!

(Special thanks to Billy "Baldylox" Bennett for the pictures and allowing me to make fun of him.)

Cable's ORIGINAL Star Wars comic strips
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.16.03 12:01am
Years before "The Cantina" Comic Strip was even a sparkling synapse in my cranium, I drew a comic strip for the Cavalier Daily newspaper at the University of Virginia. And in the winter of 1997, inspired by the re-release of the Original Trilogy, I drew my first series of Star Wars-inspired comic strips. I've held off on posting an archive of my 1997 Peanut Gallery comic strips, mostly because the CD archive is full of holes. And some of the largest holes are with my Star Wars strips. I didn't want to post a half-assed archive that was missing my best stuff.

The coolest C-3PO proto of all!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.16.03 12:01am
No matter how lame a character you might believe C-3PO to be, there are a number of very interesting vintage prototypes associated with him. There's that huge run of carrying case prototypes; there's the unproduced Micro 4-UPs; there's those walkie-talkie things Derby tries to get so much money for. But of all the ones I've seen, none compare to the absolutely spectacular prototype that I just added to my collection. And no, I'm not saying that because I'm biased...

As you know, the molds for the 4" Removable Limbs C-3PO were re-used to create the Droids cartoon version of the figure. He was cast in yellow plastic and parts were painted blue and tan to match the cartoon. The resulting figure was very nice, and I have a couple loose ones and a couple carded ones in my collection. You know all that... but you may not know that Kenner actually considered doing the same thing with the 12" C-3PO. The result was this hand-painted mock-up:

I recently purchased this awesome piece from Ed A. Up until Eddie contacted me about it, I never even knew it existed. Note: Please DO NOT contact Eddie regarding this 3PO. He's been swamped with E-mails and calls since this article was posted. It's become an annoyance, and he doesn't want to field any more questions about it. The body is cast in yellow plastic, and the accents were hand-painted to match the 4" figure. Similar to the Droids C-3PO figure carrying case, this figure was considered for production, but ultimately rejected. So this mock-up is the only example in existence!!

This wasn't the first time Kenner considered re-using the vintage 12" C-3PO mold... they also tried to create a motorized, walking 12" C-3PO, and a "dirty" 12" C-3PO for the ESB line. Both of those concepts were also rejected, and only prototypes exist to tell the tale.

So I hope you appreciate the newest addition to my C-3PO collection! I only wish they'd mass-produced them... these suckers would have been sweet!!!

Comic comic comic
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.23.03 12:01am
This week's update is so long, I know you don't want to read some long intro to the comic strip. So here you go: This week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

CREATURE CANTINA'S NEW GRADING SERVICE!
Posted by: toasty 07.23.03 12:01am
Are you tired of AFA's inflated pricing? The long wait times, only to realize that your "minty-mint, case fresh" Star Wars figures was a mere 85? Screw that! We at the Creature Cantina can help! With a mind towards the future, we have implemented a full proof system - based on Uber collector, and Creature Cantina founder, owner, and operator.. the man himself, Bill Cable!

Here's how it works. Once we receive your figures, we thoroughly examine in our 'clean room'. We point out any flaws or defects in your figure. Once we do that, we use our specially designed patented UV-proof container. (What AFA never tells you is that UV light can still damage your mint carded figures, even in their 'fancy' acrylic cases)

Once your container has been sealed, we apply our grading label. As you can see, this Silver Boba Fett achieved a "SWEET!", represented by 4 ½ Bills. I'm sure that once these babies start hitting eBay, the prices will only continue to rise!

So, now that I have your interest, here is our pricing and grading information.

Our grading services is a mere $4.95! Add to that your preferred shipping method for your final cost.

Our grading scale is:

• One BILL: Complete and udder shit.
• One and a half BILLS: What a piece of crap!
• Two BILLS: You paid WHAT for that?!?
• Two and a half BILLS: Ehh.
• Three BILLS: Hey, you get what you pay for.
• Three and a half BILLS: Our C7-YB
• Four BILLS: Not bad, but I've seen better.
• Four and a half BILLS: SWEET!
• FIVE BILLS: F*** yeah! (NOTE - We've only seen 1, maybe 2 C3-P0's at this level. This is so minty fresh, Colgate tried to sue us!)

So there you go! Any questions, email grading@creaturecantina.com!

Cool eBay auctions!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.23.03 12:01am
It sucks when someone has embarrassing photos of you... compromising stuff involving "Golden Rods" and "nude 12-inchers"... Because when someone has photos like that, you end up having to promote lame-ass eBay auctions such as the ones below.

Tripping Droopies
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 07.23.03 12:01am
Fed up with the lousy pay and surly audience at Jabba the Hut's crime den, Droopy McCool called it quits with Max Rebo and his brood last week to seek other fortunes.

It would seem that his prayers were answered Saturday when he was seen playing with none other than Dave Mathews Band in Dallas!

When asked the reason for the sudden line up change mid-tour, Mr. Matthews was quoted as saying, "Leroi Moore was a great horn man... but let's face it, the guy was a fat turd. Droopy actually looks like a fat turd, but the kid's got spunk!"

DMB plans on hooking up with Max Rebo for a blow out gig later this summer. It is rumored that The Modal Nodes might even open! Look for tour dates and ticket prices soon!

Lucas Drops Bomb on SW Fans
Posted by: Jedi Tronzo 07.23.03 12:01am
In an effort to capitalize one last time on the Star Wars phenomenon, George Lucas today made a major announcement about the upcoming Episode III. An insider at Lucas's ILM, who wishes to remain nameless (will call him Bob R.) told Creature Cantina reporters that Mr. Lucas wants to "soak" Star Wars fans for all they are worth and that Mr. Lucas it not overly concerned about the overall quality of the final Star Wars movie. Amidst countless accusations and rumors, Lucas spoke publicly this afternoon at a press conference at Skywalker Ranch.

Click here for the rest of the story.

Top 10 Ways Star Wars Collecting Could be Worse
Posted by: Big E 07.23.03 12:01am
10 K-Mart becomes "the source" for new figures.
9 12" line becomes strictly store exclusives.
8 Fall 2003 line consists solely of Maul and Jango repacks.
7 BountyHunter GNT becomes official spokesperson for Hasbro.
6 To cut costs, Hasbro uses repainted Jango Pilot as base for ALL new figures in 2004.
5 Wal-Mart orders more Wave 1 Cantina Bar sets.
4 Two day, 600 mile toy runs cause gas shortage on east coast.
3 Re-packs continue in 2004 with Jar Jar and Taun We.
2 All toys 1 per case, all cases 1 per store.
1 Bins of Jango Pilot spontaneously combust in Toys-R-Us stores driving retailer into Chapter 11.

12" Droids C-3PO - Proto or No?
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.23.03 12:01am
Aw crap... it looks like there are some people out there questioning the legitimacy of the 12" C-3PO proto I posted images of last week. I've seen statements like "that's not a real prototype" and "because everything posted on CC.com is true" from some very respected collectors. Well I'm here to answer all the questions and remove any doubts. I assure you that the figure is 100%...

Tune in next week when I'll show off some of my super-rare ROTJ/POTF transition pieces and my DROIDS SKIFF!!!

The BEST part of the update
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.30.03 12:01am
Everyone knows the best thing about CreatureCantina.com is my comic strip. Right? Please, humor me here... No wait; I want the truth. I'm digging for affirmation here, but it'll only mean anything if it's true. Well, I'd still get the support I need if you lied about it but didn't say you were lying. But be honest here - is the strip the best thing going? Really? Maybe you'd be able to better tell me if you had an example. How about this week's edition of "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!???

Boonta Eve Tatooine Tidbits
Posted by: Lord Melbury 07.30.03 12:01am
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

EMPIRE - TPG!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.30.03 12:01am
Damn my short attention span!! Last week I formatted all my "The Peanut Gallery" comic strips from the big "Empire Strikes Back" series. Then I went and forgot to post the damn things as part of the update. All the fantastic CC.com contributor stories must have clouded my brain. Anyway, this run is definitely worth the wait... it's great stuff (if I do say so myself)! Be sure to enjoy these old-school "Cable Original" comic strips!!

"C" is for Carded Collectibles in Crappy Condition
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 07.30.03 12:01am
It seems that Sesame Street's beloved blue connoisseur of circular confections, Cookie Monster, has turned from cuddly to criminal. First reported by a member of Rebelscum, some hapless collector posted a freshly defaced MOC IG-88 on eBay after a visit from C. Monster in the hopes of selling the now worthless piece of crap on to get rid of the ghastly reminder of "the day the Muppet snapped."

CC.com decided to dig deeper. We recently contacted the now captured and incarcerated Monster to ask him exactly why he went on what has been described as, "a hissy fit," by witnesses of the crime.

"That punk Yoda and I were shooting dice behind Oscar the Grouch's trashcan, and the bitch pulled some Jedi mind trick and stole all my money. After stewing about it for a week, I lost it. I saw this geeky PBS executive on the set showing Gordon and Linda his newest eBay nerd toy, and that Star Wars picture reminded me of the pointy eared fool. So I chewed it up. And I'd do it again, too!"

When asked how "the Blue Menace" (as he is now dubbed on the show) suddenly has become so articulate, Mr. Monster replied with, "I do that Me like Cookie stuff on the show only, understand? "K" is for kiss my ass!"

Here is a photo of the Monstrous Muppet caught in the act during the destruction of the prized possession.

Check out Dito's Auctions!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 07.30.03 12:01am
Long ago, our good buddy Dito tried to sell off his POTF2 12" collection - in a single lot of 88 MIB figures with a hefty reserve. And despite our best efforts here to plug his auction, even the power of the Cantina couldn't overcome Dito's eBay listing ineptitude.

Dito's 12" Auctions - GREAT DEALS!!!

Down On The Farm
Posted by: Marblehead 07.30.03 12:01am
A little known fact exists within the Star Wars galaxy. The Lars family was not the only farming family portrayed in this space mythology.

Han Solo is the rogue space pirate, smuggling illegal substances across intergalactic borders until most recently when his sexual appetite was wooed by the lovely Leia, Princess. Since befriending the rebel alliance, Solo now has more time to dabble in his favorite of hobbies. We've known for years about his frugal beginnings as a carpenter. What is not so well known is that Han Solo was passed these creative genes through his family lineage.

Han Solo was aptly named after his great grandfather twenty-five times over, farmer and inventor, Han "Ezra" Silo.

In 1874 Mr. Emmett Grubb of Pliny-on-the-Poca (Poca, WV) decided that he could shave considerable costs from well-making. After a well was dug, it had to be lined with brick to keep it from collapsing. This was the most expensive part of well-making. Mr. Grubb decided that he could build the brick well facing above ground, and then dig the well from beneath it, thus making the job less expensive. He had Godfrey Zott, a well-known douser, find a likely spot, and he erected a brick structure that resembled the interior of a large well.

Then he had men come in to dig out from under the structure. This went well, and the brick structure was lowered about 15 feet into the ground in this fashion. However, at this point, the workers refused to dig any deeper fearing that the entire structure would collapse on them. For almost 20 years this structure sat unminded.

In 1892 Mr. Han Silo took note of the untended structure and came up with a use for it. He decided that it would be a good place to store corn and grain. He had a cap built for it, and had some windows and a door installed. This was such a successful storage structure, that farmers began to ask for similar "silos" (as they came to be called) to be built on their farms.

By 1902, Mr. Han Silo had become a wealthy man as a result of his highly utile invention.

The Poca Post issued a stamp honoring Mr. Han Silo, inventor of a revolutionary grain storage device. The stamp honoring Han Silo was issued on 14 August, 2002 in a pane of 12 stamps in the denomination of 9 poca units.

Unlike many of the "facts" reported on CreatureCantina.com the story of Han Silo is a true to life fact. So let it be known that on this date in history, 23 July 2003, CreatureCantina.com reached out and educated possibly three children world wide.

Anything else??
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.06.03 12:01am
With all these other stories, did your humble host have the chance to put together this week's strip? You betcha!! Check out this week's edition of "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

CC.com gives back to the community
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.06.03 12:01am
With all we here do to damage the collecting community... tearing down respectable collectors, engaging in hoaxes, plugging lame auctions (where has Jason Coulston been all these months?)... it's only fitting that we do something to prop this wreck back up. And we did it this past weekend. CreatureCantina.com was proud to help sponsor the 2003 OSWCC Summer Social. Our contribution - original artwork from a recent "The Cantina" comic strip. It was among the many fabulous donations in the prize pool. And the lucky winner who chose the artwork...

A glimpse of what's to come...
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.06.03 12:01am
I'd hoped to have everything ready to reveal my latest project with this week's update (it's not every week I publish 3 of my "Cable Originals"). But alas, it was not to be. An ill-advised trip to this dorky "social" in Ohio last weekend made it impossible for me to have everything in place. Mostly, I can't find a stupid friggin' template for a COA. So the big revelation will need to wait until next week. But to pique your curiosity, here's a sneak peak of what you'll be seeing next week...

PSWCS Member Infiltrates Ohio
Posted by: Big E 08.06.03 12:01am
This just in, Bill Cable, founder of PSWCS and editor of CreatureCantina, has been caught on film trying to infiltrate the OSWCC Summer Social.

When approached it appears that Mr. Cable became angry at the paparazzi. As displayed by this photo, Mr. Cable had several choice words, and gestures, for the photog.

Interestingly enough, former PSWCS member and new OSWCC member, Ed Lee is seen fraternizing with Mr. Cable. Neither had a comment on the nature of Mr. Cable's visit to Ohio, but shamelessly plugging his budding art career seems to be the leading contender on message boards.

As pictures documenting the summer event show, Cable became one of "those guys," insinuating himself in as many photos as possible

The final straw in Cable's party crashing ways was his trotting-out of this C-3PO Cromalin. Several OSWCC members were heard commenting, "Again? This guy needs a new show-and-tell item."

At that point it was decided that the OSWCC members knowledge of The Force would not be enough to defeat Bill Cable. The matter would have to be settled with lightsabers.

Even Joe Corroney, a professional artist whose work has appeared in The Insider, was tired of Cable's arrogance.

Once the threat was taken care of, it appears that the OSWCC was able to declare their 2003 summer social a rousing success.

JEDI - TPG
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.06.03 12:01am
In 1997, George Lucas re-released the Original Trilogy in "Special Edition" form. At the time, I was the comic strip artist of "The Peanut Gallery" for the Cavalier Daily at the University of Virginia (WaHooWa!!). To commemorate the re-release, I did an homage to the films in my comics. Below is my final series of comics based on ROTJ. Enjoy!!

CantinaCelebs from Germany
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.06.03 12:01am
Laos has the Great Sacred Stupa. Hawaii has volcanoes and Tiki gods. The South Pole by all accounts has lots and lots of snow. And it appear that Germany has... beer!

Well, at least that's what a few guys from the Netherlands decided to take photos of on their recent trip to the land of Oktoberfest. "PaulyMT," Maurice and Bart hoisted a few pints in honor of CC.com, and thus they've been added to the "Cantina Celebrities" gallery under our "CreatureCantina.com Sucks Around the World!!" heading. Enjoy these shots.

Sandy's Quick Shots!
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 08.06.03 12:01am

THREE New Cable Originals!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.06.03 12:01am
I have a special treat for you this week. Not one new "Cable Original." Not two new "Cable Originals." No... this time I'm giving you three, THREE NEW "Cable Originals!!!" Ha Ha Ha!!! But this begs the question... why the hell would I blow three weeks worth of big publicity by releasing all these images all at once?? Well... there's a very good reason. Curious? Well then check out the "Cable Original" Star Wars Art Gallery!!!!

You know you've reached the end of the update when...
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.13.03 12:01am
I don't know... am I the only person who when reading a newspaper always reads the comics last? For me, it's like dessert. You eat your meat, your potatoes, your ruffage... then when you're just about full you fill up on that one last precious morsel of sweetness. Well, here's your sweetness, this week's edition of "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

Sandy's Quick Shots!
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 08.13.03 12:01am

Turning Over a New Leaf
Posted by: Big E 08.13.03 12:01am
After reading through a lot of the RebelScum.com forums, mostly Saga, Clone Wars and the Gentle Giants bust posts in Other Collectibles, I've decided to turn over a new leaf.

Some may try to argue that if something like this were to happen the scalpers would step in and make things just that much harder for collectors. I say, bull. Scalpers are in it for the quick buck. Spending all day driving from retailer to retailer to find these figures will expend to much gas for them. They'll be able to leave the SW figures alone and continue with their Masters of the Universe, Transformers and Ninja Turtles speculation. Let them ruin those hobbies next.

An original new form of Cable Art!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.13.03 12:01am
I love doing my B&W ink drawings - just love it! And I hope the demand keeps up so I can keep going on with them for years to come. But I feel it's time for me to branch out a bit... and I've found a way to do it. Introducing my latest brainchild - "Cable Original" Custom Carded Figures!!!

The auction description really says it all on this piece. Original figure and weapon, original Droids coin, repro bubble affixed with epoxy. It was a really fun project (actually ongoing, since I haven't yet carded all 10, just the first 3). And I already have ideas for the next couple characters I'd like to do. But first I gotta see if I can recover my investments, so everything hinges on how well this auction does (not that I'm trying to pressure my loyal readers here into bidding or anything...). So please, check it out. And if it does it for you, go ahead and bid. No pressure!! Don't even consider the fact that this whole project will be dead in the water if nobody else bids... And if you have any sort of opinion on the piece whatsoever, why not post your thoughts in the Cantina Forums? One last thing, I added some images of the art in the Cable Original Star Wars Art Gallery.

Another Cantina Comic Strip??
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.20.03 12:01am
Is this "comic strip thing" getting old yet? One a week... 52 weeks a year... it's just too much, isn't it? Cool... then you won't mind me skipping this week's...

OK, just kidding. Here you go... this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

eBay This Day: A Bunch of Jack-Asses
Posted by: toasty 08.20.03 12:01am
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3142263491

It would seem that some people appear to have more money than brains. Here we a have last year's Toy Fair silver chrome Darth Vader. A very cool figure, and it looks great as part of my collection. Of course, I paid $14 plus shipping for mine. Get AFA to grade it, and it sell for OVER TWO-FREAKING-HUNDRED dollars! That's not yen or pesos, but AMERICAN money. Unreal. Of course, you can't give away this year's silver Boba Fett. Maybe it would have been cooler if it didn't look like Hasbro used a can of silver Krylon spray paint. Jeez... I need to find me a Star Wars sugar daddy!

Target installs defibrillators
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.20.03 12:01am
Following a rash of mysterious heart attacks, the Target department store chain has initiated a program to install automatic defibrillator machines in the toy sections of each of it's 1100 stores across the country. More than 300 people, most men between the ages of 25 and 32, have collapsed over dead in just the past two weeks while walking down the action figure aisle. Toxicology and environmental hazard tests have all turned up negative. As a result, Target has resorted to treating the symptoms rather than eliminating the cause of the problem.

Members of the Target Board of Directors and their CEO have declined comment pending additional inquiries into the source of these mysterious deaths. CC.com's own investigation may have turned up a vital clue, based on eyewitness accounts of one recent death. A portly gentleman who was shopping for "PR5" Hot Wheels cars said he overheard a guy in the next aisle blurt out, "My God... they have..." before hearing a loud thud. Even with this compelling account, we can't begin to speculate what the victims could be finding... what could be so shockingly out-of-the-ordinary in the Target action figure aisle to cause such severe reactions.

Collector gives up Star Wars for a girl?!?
Posted by: toasty 08.20.03 12:01am
While it appears that most Star Wars collectors are still raiding the shelves at Target and Wal*Mart for the latest Star Wars figures, you can count out "SW_Collector_29" from the Rebelscum forums. Word has it that "SW_Collector_29" has landed himself a REAL girlfriend, after years of swearing, "Dude, I met her at Niagara Falls! She lives in Canada!"

I spoke briefly with "POTF_junkie", who stated that "The only thing that would keep that guy off his computer would be poon-tang." Of course, this has sent users on the RS forums into a frenzy. Off-topic threads such as "Have you ever seen boobs, and not paid for them?" are being closed as soon as they are started. Some are happy for "SW_Collector_29," whom our sources state is "in love" and "seeing the sun for the first time in 12 or 13 years". Way to go, "SW_Collector_29!" Do me a favor, and the next time you're 'hitting it,' make her call you "toasty". You've seen the signs, all the ladies love me. "MMMM, TOASTY!" indeed.

Sandy's Quick Shots!
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 08.20.03 12:01am

THE Vintage Action Figure book - available now!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.20.03 12:01am
After teasing us sad souls for weeks with his "previews" and "descriptions" of the Vintage book to end all books, John Kellerman finally got his ass in gear and gave us the ability to order the damn thing. That's right - you can order Kellerman's "Star Wars Action Figures" book today! Right now! This very second!!! All you gotta do is go to FrontBackBooks.com and click the "Order a Book" link. And get this - he accepts PayPal! That's right - international buyers with unconfirmed mailing address - prepare for mass fraud!!! $28 shipping?? Like he'll see a cent of that moolah... WooHoo!!!

Take it to the bank...
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.27.03 12:01am
As reliable as the RebelScum forums servers... it's your weekly dose of Star Wars comic strip goodness!! Get ready for this week's pulse-pounding episode of "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

Sandy's Quick Shots!
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 08.27.03 12:01am

Love is in the air - AT REBELSCUM?!?
Posted by: toasty 08.27.03 12:01am
Looks like the latest gimmick for Rebelscum is nothing other than... LOVE! The Rebelscum marketing machine discovered that their prime marketing target (males aged 18-35) were also horny bastards. The solution seems simple - dating, courtesy of Rebelscum! Now eager young men can meet with their fantasy women on latest Rebelscum forums.

Kudos to the 'Scum team!

From out of the EU - a new Cable Original!
Posted by: Bill Cable 08.27.03 12:01am
It isn't often that I get to delve into the realm of the Expanded Universe when doing one of my drawings. Most of my customers are purists - they want a character out of the movies, not out of the pages of some book. I suppose this latest edition to the "Cable Original" Gallery qualifies as both... he was in both the movies and the books... OK, I'm going to stray for my normal form and reveal this latest character in the body of the article instead of making you "click to the gallery" to find out... the latest addition to my gallery is Han Solo from the New Jedi Order book "Hero's Trial."

There was really only one photo reference for this outfit of Han's, the book cover. And you can see from that cover I really didn't have much to go by. But I did my best. Maybe this will inspire all you EU fans to take a second look at maybe getting a "Cable Original." You can see the fruits of my latest labor in the "Cable Original" Star Wars Art Gallery!!!

A special "The Cantina" Comic!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.03.03 12:01am
You've reached the bottom of the update, ready to read this week's comic strip. Lucky for you... you're in for something special! You see, this week's idea was submitted by none other than my own brother!! As soon as he sent in an idea, I had to do it immediately. Joy in the Cable family this week! And the idea isn't all that bad either... check it out in this week's edition of "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

Some SPAM is too good to not to pass on...
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.03.03 12:01am
Having used the same E-mail address going on three years now, you know I get a TON of SPAM. Most of it is either Korean or advertisements for Viagra... but every once in a while a real gem shows up. Like the following...

---

From: "" [laura_16@bahn.de]
To: [cable@creaturecantina.com]
Subject: Dimensional Warp Generator Needed vocltl
Date: Tue, 02 Sep 03 04:50:04 GMT

Hello,

I'm a time traveler stuck here in 2003. Since nobody here seems to be able to get me what I need (safely here to me), I will have to build a simple time travel circuit to get where I need myself. I am going to need an easy to follow picture diagram for a simple time travel circut, which can be built out of (readily available) parts here in 2003. Please email me any schematics you have. I will pay good money for anything you send me I can use. Or if you have the rechargeable AMD dimensional warp generator wrist watch unit available, and are 100% certain you have a (secure) means of delivering it to me please also reply. Send a separate email to me at: webmaster@custompaintshop.net.

Do not reply back directly to this email as it will only be bounced back to you.

Thank You
Brian Appel

---

Damnit... I just sold my LAST rechargeable AMD dimensional warp generator wrist watch unit on eBay a few days ago. Of all the luck...

Collectors strike back against collectors!
Posted by: toasty 09.03.03 12:01am
SWAT team members in riot gear are now patrolling the isles of the latest Cincinnati "Target" retail store. What are they protecting? Low, low prices? No, my friend. They're protecting scalpers - that's right, scalpers. Those overweight, fat, greasy lazy sacks of sh*t. I spoke with SWAT commander Kip O'Reily to try and get a picture of what happened.

This another all-to-apparent sign of "toy rage", a nasty affliction where collectors of toy lines turn feral rather than lose their quarry. Strangely enough, this doesn't happen to vintage Star Wars collectors, as my research found there to be a "totally different market" for vintage. Modern toy collectors (Star Wars in particular) should beware. Police have "shoot on site" orders for any collect suspected fallen under the spell of "toy rage". Remember folks, collect to collect. Let's end the violence, so we all can go home and play with our toys.

"Case Fresh" = "Extra Crispy?"
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.03.03 12:01am
It used to be... I don't know, up until around the start of the 2003 Saga waves, that when you found new figures on the pegs at Target or Wal*mart, they'd be in pretty nice shape. Sure, there was the occasional dinged bubble or creased cardback... but by-and-large they were generally minty.

There's your collecting tip of the week from your friends at CreatureCantina.com.

A new patron in "The Cantina"
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.10.03 12:01am
I was struck by a bit of inspiration last week... came up with a new idea for a comic strip (that's right... this one's my idea!). And this idea may very well have repercussions across the entire Star Wars universe!! What the hell am I talking about? Find out in this week's edition of "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!

A very literally-titled eBay auction
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.10.03 12:01am
I run into all sorts of goofy auctions in my searches for unique 3PO items. But this one is just downright misleading...

I suppose the figure is technically "on the card"...

Fan Club Boba Fett: Or, why I hate whiners
Posted by: Big E 09.10.03 12:01am
September 2, 2003 at 12:00pm PST was the first time that Star War fans could order the Hasbro silver Boba Fett figure from the Official Star Wars Fan Club. After being available at various conventions all summer long, this was the first time that members in the US and some foreign countries would be able to order one directly.

Since Paizo Publishing has been in charge of the Fan Club the Insider has become readable again. There are cool articles and stories, a lot of content, and several times a year we get Bantha Tracks. And they are much more fan-friendly. The silver Boba Fett is a cool exclusive that the club went out of their way to get. I think they should be commended for their efforts, not ripped down because a handful of people had to wait an hour or two to get a toy.

CC.com reaches South of the Border
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.10.03 12:01am
From time to time, I check out the referral links to my site. We get tons of hits from the RS forums, KennerToys.com, and a number of other domestic web sites. But from time to time, we get some far-out links... and this one certainly qualifies. How often is it that a site gets a plug all the way from BRAZIL??? Well, at least for this site... NOT OFTEN!!

http://www.jedimania.com.br/noticia.asp?id=982

GalacticHunter teams with Snoop Dogg
Posted by: toasty 09.10.03 12:01am
In an effort to combat the success of Rebelscum new dating service - "Scum Connection" - Galactic Hunter has teamed with Snoop Dogg for the "Bounty Hunter Booty Call." Now members of the Galactic Hunter forums can find an appropriate date for any occasion. For the younger set, there's the "Prom Date." For the older members, there's everything from the "Can't Get a Date" package to the deluxe "Whips and Chains.. Oh My!" combo. It doesn't stop there, as you can always pick and choose any item you wish. Aayla Secura fetish, you say? Or are you looking for a little "Leia and Padme" action? Snoop promises to fulfill any need. When I spoke to the Pimp from Compton, here's what he had to say:

We're still trying to figure out what that means. Anyway, pricing is rumored to be higher than a Code3 Millennium Falcon - but much more satisfying. I hear that Snoop might even be willing to drop the price if anyone is willing to appear in one of his "Doggy Style" adult videos. Break out those credit cards boy's, it's time to get busy up in the hizzie!

PSWCS adds huge, unsightly graphics!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.10.03 12:01am
After living for two years of a rather plain, uninspiring web site... the guys over in the Pennsylvania Star Wars Collecting Society have gotten off their collective lazy asses and have redesigned the thing. Gone are the bare, line-art images of an Emperor's Royal Guard and Darth Vader head... they've been replaced by a very snazzy scan of the main man Yoda! The results of the redesign are actually quite impressive! Check them out here:

PSWCS Redesigned Site!!

My Latest Addition
Posted by: Sandy Rivers 09.10.03 12:01am
I bet you, my loyal and faithful readers, wondered where my always fabulous contribution was last week (a guy can dream, can't he?). Well...even though September 1st was a government holiday this year, I still received a bundle to add to my collection! It even came by USPS (United Stork Postal Service)!

Owen Paul Rivers (my first) was born at 5:46 a.m. on September 1st! He is 21 1/4 inches long and weighed 7 lbs. 10 oz.

A few points:

• We chose Owen as his name because it was the only boy name my wife and I can agree on. I didn't even really realize the Star Wars connection until months after we selected the name, but it's good to know there are so many fan boys out there that get a kick out of it! ;-)
• I don't think he has the Force. In fact, so far I've only been able to feel the Farts flowing within him.
• I'm pretty sure he'll get the collecting bug like his daddy. He's the only 10 day old I know that has a full set of First Shots from the Playskool Millennium Falcon Playset!

Here is a pic of my boy with his Stormtrooper First Shot:

Mom and baby are doing great!

"The Cantina" needs YOUR HELP!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 09.17.03 12:01am
This week's strip continues the idea started last week. I had a real good idea on how to run with the "Jorg Sacul" bashing. But this idea deserves to be a trilogy!!! Next week, another character should join in! I have a few pretty obvious ideas for the reason for the third beating, but none that are really worthy of immortality as a "The Cantina" strip. So I need your help. I need you to E-mail me with your ideas for how the third strip in the series should go down. Who should be the third character to participate? What should his reasoning be for kicking ol' Jorg while he's down? What are his greatest sins??? But be sure to read this week's strip first... don't want a bunch of repeats of something I already did! So please check out this week's "The Cantina" Comic Strip!!!!