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Feel the love of Nimrod!
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 8-1-01 10:01am
You know that behind the gruff,
profane exterior the Nimrod is really just a warm and fuzzy snuggleball.
Geek joy exudes in the latest "The
Mighty Nimrod Speaks!!"
New Feature: Cantina Celebrities!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-1-01 10:01am
What started as a joke has evolved
into a mission... and we're proud to present our new feature:
"Cantina Celebrities!!" We're
looking for photos like these:
I have a line on some photos for GenCon this weekend. But I want
the ALL!! So if you're going to be seeing some SW celebs, make
sure you put together a sign and take some photos. We all want
to see what the cast and crew of Star Wars thinks of our site!
E-mail me for
more details!
Fun times on the Web!
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 8-8-01 10:01am
To wrap up this week's update,
we offer links two two articles on the Web...
Let's look at the original Trilogy through
the inane "politically correct" lens of 1996:
http://zena.secureforum.com/...articles/may97harris.html
Here is the best job in the world (if you want to put together a couple
of complete sets of vintage carded Star Wars figures and an amazing
array of prototypes):
http://makingcollegecount.com/MHSC/.../neiheisel_tom.html
And now for something COMPLETELY different...
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 8-8-01 10:01am
CreatureCantina.com presents a
new monthly feature: Nimrod's movies! You see, ol' Nim does a
bit of movie making. Once a month we're going to feature one
of his movies in QuickTime! So go ahead and check out this month's feature film!
And just in case you're about sick of The Clones...
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-8-01 10:01am
...here is your weekly dose of
THE ORIGINAL! Yeah, you know what I'm talking about! That's right...
this week's "The
Cantina" comic strip!
Nimrod has his on take on "Clones!!"
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 8-8-01 10:01am
As if your weren't expecting this...
Prepare to take in Nimrod's views on Clones and other mass-produced
humanoids in today's "The
Mighty Nimrod Speaks!"
Celebrities from GenCon!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-8-01 10:01am
The quest to get them all continues...
Here are two photos from GenCon this past weekend. I was REALLY
hoping for Billy D., but his "people" wouldn't let
him hold up the sign. Thanks to Bill Byers for his efforts!
LucasFilm Reveals E2 Teaser Poster!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-8-01 10:01am
As you already know, LucasFilm
announced the title for E2 earlier this week: Star Wars: Episode
2 - Attack of the Clones! Not that anyone cares what I think,
but I like the title. After a lot of diligent arm-twisting and
blackmail, I have been able to secure as a CreatureCantina.com
EXCLUSIVE the first image of the E2 Teaser Poster. Similar to
the Vader Shadow poster that first introduced Episode 1, this
bold image genuinely captures the spirit of the new film. CreatureCantina.com
is proud to present...
The Episode II - Attack of the Clones
Teaser Poster
We proudly present a new Cable Original
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-15-01 10:31am
Be sure to check out the Cable
Original Art Gallery for my latest drawing. Also, check out
the "Reserved" and "Requested" lists as there
have been a few modifications. Enjoy!!!
Another Comic... Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-15-01 10:31am
I do a comic every week. Some are
funnier than others. Now, I don't want to get anybody's hopes
up here, but I think this one is particularly good. Enjoy the
latest "The Cantina"
Comic Strip!!!
Happy Birthday PSWCS!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-15-01 10:31am
A year ago this week, 9 dedicated
Star Wars collectors gathered at the West Shore library in Camp
Hill, PA. On that day, the Pennsylvania Star Wars Collecting
Society was born. We played a few games and talked about the
hobby. We shared some of our collectibles. I knew when Andy Loney
pulled out his carded Jessica Meade for show-and- tell that this
was the start of something special.
 A
year later, the club is thriving. Our membership stands at 109.
I'm amazed by the amount of collecting that goes on between members.
Just yesterday a guy posted that he had a POTJ B-Wing to sell
at cost. At every meeting there's just boxes and boxes of the
newest stuff available for cost or at even trades. The dealing
is brisk and always fair.
But the most rewarding element is the sense
of community and friendship that develops among members. I've
met so many great people in the past year that it's been well
worth the work I put into creating and running the club. The
monthly meetings are a joy to attend. I'm thrilled that they're
starting up monthly meeting in the Pittsburgh area, so collectors
on both ends of the state can enjoy them on a regular basis.
PSWCS is thriving, and it's time to take
the next big step. I'm thrilled to announce the launch of the
new official Pennsylvania Star Wars Collecting Society web site
- PSWCS.com!!!
Yep, we broke down and got a domain name. With the new DN is
a brand new site with great new features. We now have a chat
room and an official comic book store - Essential Comics! So please take a moment
to check it out!
PS: Yeah, this article ain't funny. This
week's comic will make up for that...
It's comic time!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-22-01 10:31am
A big thanks goes to Max Miller
for the inspiration for today's comic. I changed it around a
little, but he gave the the essence. I hope you enjoy this week's
"The Cantina"
Comic Strip!!!
Dianoga scrapes more from the bottom of the barrel
Posted by: Dianoga 8-22-01 10:31am
It's amazing what you can find
if you stretch out your tentacles REALLY far...
Who will win? It depends... is this the
pre-Resurrection or post-Resurrection Christ?
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?=1626504128
And the Chairman reveals out theme ingredient
of the day - charred flesh!
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?=1629739380
Nimrod - out of focus...
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 8-22-01 10:31am
Better late than never... you can
thank Nim for the fact that we went out at 11:15am instead of
10:30. But I'm sure everyone will agree after reading "The Mighty Nimrod Speaks"
that it's always worth the wait to receive his wisdom.
38 die in horrific hiking mishap
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-22-01 10:31am
TETON COUNTY, Wyo. -- The nation
mourned after authorities found the remains of 38 people on Table
Mountain. The grizzly discovery ended two weeks of searches after
an anonymous tipster alerted police that there was need of a
helicopter rescue. The victims, all men between the ages of 19
to 31, exhibited various injuries including burns, lacerations,
and fractures. At least seven seemed to have died from dehydration.
A short message scrawled on the back of
the packaging of a Hasbro toy gives some clues of how this tragedy
occurred. The note indicated that the hikers "intended to
get lost, so Harrison Ford could fly in and save us."
Detective Arthur Bishop of Jackson, Wyo.
lead the search. He stated that he feels he knows the chain of
events. "This started when a couple Star Wars fans read
how Harrison Ford rescued a hiker and a Boy Scout around these
parts on two separate occasions. They cooked up this scheme to
come up here and get lost so they could meet Ford. The presence
of numerous collectible items and a case of Sharpie markers points
to the desire to obtain autographs from the usually- reclusive
super star."
"But it seems that one of the fellows
decided to E-mail some friends, and all-in-all 40 people decided
to do this together. They got lost and ran into some unexpected
problems. They packed no supplies. . opting to use all the space
possible for framed photographs, carded action figures, and life-size
cardboard standees. After two days with no food, water or shelter,
it appears a few from the group tried to burn some of the items
for warmth. A brawl ensued, resulting in numerous deaths and
injuries. The living were unable to hike back down the mountain
due to the injuries they incurred, and quickly died of dehydration."
The identities of the men have not yet
been released until authorities can contact their families. Harrison
Ford could not be reached for comment. A note scratched into
the trunk of a pine tree revealed the most tragic part of this
sad event. It read, "All we wanted to do was meet Han."
This week's comic sucks!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-29-01 10:31am
Hey guys... I need to apologize
in advance... I had to use a different scanner for my strip this
week. I thought it would be fine, but some setting was screwed
up, and it didn't turn out all that good. Even when I was coloring
it I was hoping it would turn out fine, but the finished product
just isn't up to par. So the characters don't look quite as good
as they should. But it's still damn funny, so go look at it anyway.
I'll be sure to fix the problem before the next "The
Cantina" Comic Strip!
Latest "Code Red" virus strikes Deathstar!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-29-01 10:31am
The latest version of the rampant
"Code Red" virus infected the Death Star data network,
causing wide-spread system failures. "Code Red" had
previously only been infecting Web servers or computers running
Windows 2000 or NT, so its leap to the alien binary coding of
the proprietary hardware that makes up the Death Star system
was totally unexpected.
Network Administrator Hal Kendrick was
unavailable for comment, spending the last 53 hours ceaselessly
attempting to get the problem under control. Custodial Engineer
Cletis Duff overheard many of Kendrick's comments and tells us
he can give us a fair assessment of the situation. He explains:
"The first thing I heard Hal yell
was, 'oh God, Vader's gonna kill my ass. I can feel my throat
collapsing already. Why the hell did I have to open that porn
attachment??' Then he yelled 'damnit' and other cusses about
every 2 minutes for a couple hours. I can see why he's all bent
out of shape... I ain't never seen an AstroMech droid spin around
in circles like that, much less EVERY AstroMech droid. Their
heads was popping off, and flames was shooting out of their eyes...
soon as they plugged into the Scomp link it was like 'WOOOO!!!'"
When asked how such a damaging program
could get past the elaborate system of Imperial network filters,
Network Security Consultant Jerome Adders theorized, "It
appears as if a Rebel team of a hacker and a pilot flew a repaired
Tie Fighter into docking bay 2743-H, transmitted the attachment
remotely using a portable mini-computer, then flew back to their
base before anyone could stop them. The file was broadcast across
the network and into several user mailboxes, where it was inadvertently
launched."
Adders felt the situation was quickly coming
under control. He commented, "When you have a system where
turning off any 1 of 7 power conduits ends up totally disabling
every major system, it's pretty easy to isolate a problem."
Nimrod breaks out the BLUNT weapons!
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 8-29-01 10:31am
When you think of Nimrod, and you
think of the word "club," the only logically picture
you can conjure in your brain is "baby seal." But that
is not ALWAYS the case!! Sometimes Nimrod + club = something
much more disturbing. All will be revealed in the latest "The Mighty Nimrod Speaks!!!"
We FINALLY get another piece of ASS!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 8-29-01 12:01am
We're thrilled to announce the
triumphant return of our letters column - Ask
Scott Something! A gargantuan FIVE MONTHS in the making,
Scott is finally ready to tackle the tough issues and life-changing
questions that we as collectors face every day. See, originally
Scott was going to do regular updates. But then the severance
pay evaporated, unemployment checks ran out, the economy bombed,
and he had to move to North Carolina and start a new life. Now
that he's finally settled in, he's committed to monthly updates.
So be sure to SEND
IN THOSE QUESTIONS, and fasten your sea belt for the latest
edition of Ask
Scott Something!!!
Damnit.
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-5-01 12:01am
Hello loyal fans! I just lost everything
on my HD at work. That includes everything I had for this week's
update. So unfortunately, there won't be an update this week.
If I can get my PC back up and running after I throw it out a
f%$#ing window, there'll be a GREAT update next week. Sorry for
ruining your Wednesday.
Looks like I ain't the only comic artist...
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-12-01 12:01am
So "The Cantina" isn't
the only Star Wars comic strip out there, huh? Well at least
this guy gives me my props. Check out the first edition of "The Real Life Adventures of Stratos!"
The Cantina returns!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-12-01 12:01am
I promised you a new comic every
week. Last week, my computer didn't cooperate. But this week
we're back! And now that I've broken the promise, I don't have
to feel so bad when I slack off during Christmas. Woohoo!! Enjoy
this week's "The
Cantina" Comic Strip!!!
The mighty Nimrod is pissed (and this time for good reason)!
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 9-12-01 12:01am
You didn't think Nimrod would let
this tragedy go uncommented-upon, did you? It's about time these
terrorists felt the firepower of this fully-armed and operational
battle station, in the latest "The
Mighty Nimrod Speaks!!"
The phenomenon gains momentum...
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-12-01 12:01am
If you're a regular reader, you
should be familiar with our "CreatureCantina.com SUCKS!"
campaign. We're trying to get as many SW Celebs as possible to
hold up our sing and have a photo taken. Well, we've received
a new celebrity submission! Check this one out... good, it is!!
Finally EEU Figures Revealed.
Posted by: Stofer 9-12-01 12:01am
Finally the full line up of the
new Hasbro EEU (Extended Expanded Universe) line has been revealed.
The EEU line, for those who haven't followed our regular Creature
Cantina reports, is a line of action figures based on non-movie
Star Wars references. The first wave is Bill Murray from Saturday
Night live; Weird Al and Sidious from Weird Al's recent Star
Wars video; Darth Nader, Muppets regular Gonzo in his Darth Vader
outfit; Yogurt from Spaceballs, Chewchilla from Hardware Wars;
and finally Ross' Dream from the NBC comedy Friends, apparently
Rachel in her Slave Leia costume.
Here at Creature Cantina we've used our
innumerous shady informants to actually get the pack-out for
the new assortment (coming this October). So without further
ado, here it is:
- Bill Murray, Lounge Lizard: 3x
- Weird Al in Jedi Robes: 3x
- Darth Sidious with Sith Piano: 2x
- Darf Nader: 2x
- Yogurt: 2.5x
- Chewchilla: 3x
- Ross' Dream: .5x
When asked about the naming of the Ross'
Dream figure, Hasbro had this comment: "We asked Jennifer
Aniston for the rights to use her name or the name of the character
in the show, but she declined on both accounts. So we came up
with this title for the figure. Everyone will still know who
it is, but we'll avoid a lawsuit."
We also asked what was up with the .5 pack-out.
"We decided to put only one Ross' Dream figure in every
*other* box. It will drive up collectibility and make everyone
buy more of the rest of the figures just to get that one. Now
you might have to buy two or even three boxes of figures just
to get one Ross' Dream. That makes our sales figures look *so*
much better and we really want this line to succeed."
We polled many... well, ok several....
alright *ONE* CC.com reader for his thoughts on the new assortment.
"I think this pack-out sucks. What red-blooded American
male isn't going to want a Ross' Dream figure? They should have
just made the whole case that figure."
EEU will be hitting store shelves in October,
so be on the look out.
Your greatest fears confirmed - YELLOW POTF2 BUBBLES!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-12-01 12:01am
CreatureCantina.com EXCLUSIVE!!! Everyone here knows that yellow bubbles are a
problem for vintage Star Wars collectors. Lots of POTF and ROTJ
figures have those ugly, urine-colored bubbles from years of
oxidation and other chemical reactions in the plastic. This can
often be exacerbated by exposure to sun or fluorescent lighting,
but there have been instances where factory-sealed cases were
open in the mid-90s only to find a dozen yellow-bubbled Waroks.
POTF2 collectors thought themselves immune
to this problem. Surely plastics have improved in the 10 years
between the Droids and Ewoks line and POTF2. Well, we're here
to tell you today that THEY HAVEN'T!! Here today is the first
ever evidence of a yellow-bubbled POTF2 figure! From the collection
of Matthew Prokop comes this yellow-bubbled Luke Dagobah! Click
for a larger image.
This is NOT a joke! This is a real YB POTF2
figure! It was stored in darkness, in a cool dry room, right
next to the CB C-3PO. The discoloration is not due to smoking
or other environmental factors... the plastic has yellowed!!
It's the same thing that has happened to thousands of vintage
bubbles, but this time it's a figure that was made since 1995!!
So cringe in fear, all you MOC new-era
collectors!! The scourge of yellow bubbles that has haunted vintage
collectors for years is coming to get you! You can't prevent
it! You can't reverse it! All you can do is pray that your figure
isn't the next victim!! We're all doomed!! DOOMED!!! AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Because we know you need a laugh...
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-12-01 12:01am
After the terrorist attacks yesterday,
I was torn whether to put up this week's update or not. I agonized
over the decision for a long time. After talking to my wife about
it, it seemed like the right thing to do. We shouldn't allow
these terrorists run our lives, so the best course of action
is business as usual. And after yesterday, about the best thing
I can do is help some folks have a good laugh. So without further
ado, we're proud to present this weeks CreatureCantina.com update!!!
And finally... If you can't whore for yourself...
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-19-01 12:01am
So I upgraded my ESB47 Removable
Limbs C-3PO a couple weeks ago. Got a nice, UP, CB example...
really sweet shape. And you know what happens when you upgrade...
you have your old one to get rid of! I tried offering it to PSWCS
and OSWCC, but there were no takers... so my site here's the
next step before eBay. I'm only looking to make back what I originally
paid for this one... $75 shipped.
This 3PO is in pretty nice shape... not
C10, but no major flaws:
- bubble slightly yellow, otherwise flawless.
- Several minor flaws on the card including:
- 2 "spider" creases on the bottom
edge ... one 1/2" only visible on the front, one 1"
visible on front & back.
- 1 3/4" spider crease on the right
side visible only on the front.
- 1 2" bend/spider crease on the left
side... a bend on the front, a spider crease on the back.
- 2 tiny white specs to the left of the
punch.
- it looks like someone pulled up a price
tag in the top right corner... there are minor finger nail dents
in the card, and a few tiny white specs.
- punched cleanly.
- minor edgewear and wear around the punch.
I'm very tough at grading, and most of
these flaws wouldn't even be mentioned by your average seller.
Basically it's a nice carded figure with some minor flaws.
E-mail me at cable@creaturecantina.com
if you're interested!
New art in the Cable Gallery!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-19-01 12:01am
Looks like this week's update is
all-Cable, all the time! Lucky I had some good stuff to share.
Speaking of good stuff... how about that new drawing over at
my "Cable Original" gallery??
Ain't it cool?? Don't I deserve all sorts of praises heaped upon
me?? Isn't it the best thing you've ever seen inked on paper??
Man... if I wasn't so humble I'd think I deserved lots of congratulatory
E-mails and stuff for this drawing. At the very least, I hope
you enjoy it!
Yoda dominates in "Iron Chef" debut!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-19-01 12:01am
The world of cooking was set on
its ear this past weekend after an impressive victory by budding
culinary master Yoda on Food Network's cult hit "Iron Chef."
"Iron Chef" is a Japanese television show where two
chefs face-off in a 1-hour cooking battle. Chairman Kaga chooses
a "theme ingredient" for each match, and the chef that
best expresses that ingredient in his dishes wins the contest.
In an unprecedented move, Yoda was able to defeat Masaharu Morimoto
with a single dish - Foie Gras porridge.
"A difficult battle this was... no
fan of goose liver am I," reflected Yoda after his stunning
victory. He scored a perfect 20 with all 4 tasters, placing him
among the elite in "Iron Chef's" distinguished list
of challengers.
The tasters reacted emphatically to chef
Yoda's porridge dish. "This is amazing... I've never tasted
such an excellent foie gras dish in my life," commented
Asako Kishi - noted food critic. Actress Chizuru Azuma concurred,
noting, "the peace and balance of this dish pleases me deeply...
very good." Photographer Tenmei Kano summarized their thoughts
most eloquently stating, "Like this I do... good porridge
this is... a perfect score I will give, yes."
Iron Chef Morimoto was not so impressed
as the tasters... "His porridge tasted like dirt!"
he exclaimed. "All he did was mix mud and foie gras in a
dish and boiled it for an hour. You cannot imagine how upset
I am right now. A master chef... beaten by a bowl of mud!!"
Wednesday comic... created with love!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-19-01 12:01am
This week's comic is special. Why
is it special? Because my wife gave me the idea. Awwww... isn't
that just precious? So I hope you enjoy "Lady's Night"
at "The Cantina"
Comic Strip!!!
Why post content when you can use bribes?
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-19-01 12:01am
Hello fellow Star Wars junkies!
You know, I was thinking... why even bother posting fresh humorous
content here every week, when we can just bribe you suckers to
keep coming back?? And what the hell... might as well get you
guys to write new stories while we're at it!! So CreatureCantina.com
is proud to announce our first ever contest!! I'm looking for
a couple good comic strip ideas.
Essential Comics -
the Web's BEST, COOLEST,
MOST AWESOME on-line comic book store has donated a couple
DVDs for me to give away. The BEST
idea will not
only see print on 9/26/01, it will win you a brand new copy of
"What Lies Beneath," starring our very own Han
Solo! (winner must be 18 or older). Also, we will randomly draw
one entry to win a brand new copy of "Space Cowboys,"
starring Tommy Lee Jones, who tried to shoot our very own Han
Solo!
To enter, simply E-mail your comic idea
to newstips@creaturecantina.com,
along with your name and birth date. The entry deadline is 9/29/01
at 12:00am EST.
So send in those entries! And check out
Essential
Comics - any store gullible
enough to give us free crap is certain to
offer AMAZING DEALS on all your Star Wars and comic book
needs!!
The Earth Toy Shop finally sells coveted hummer.
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-26-01 12:01am
When the employees at "The Earth"
needed to raise some cash, they though, "what could be easier
to sell than a hummer?" With a clientele that's nearly 97%
male, an exciting thing like a hummer seemed a sure sell. But
with an initial asking price of $125,000, takers were few and
far between.
Store employee Joe Yunger was shocked by
the lack of interest. "We're talking about a HUMMER here!
Not just any hummer... but a Star Wars hummer... delivered by
the nice girls here at the Earth! I mean... Dave Prowse enjoyed
this same hummer the last time he was in town. Jeremy Bulloch
had an amazing time with it too. Even Kenny Baker joined in the
fun! I can't understand why we didn't get dozens of offers to
pay for a hummer from us."
Regular Earth customer Peter North described
his own impressions of what was being offered. "I was there
when they first gave the hummer to Dave Prowse, and he really
seemed to get a kick out of it. Just looking at the power and
intensity of that thing... I mean you know it's going to make
your toes curl. It's the best hummer I've ever seen. But for
$125,000? I'll have to pass."
After many months of trying to lure in
a customer, The Earth finally just put it up on eBay. "What
we really needed was a national audience for this hummer,"
Yunger explained. "Cincinnati has some of the best Star
Wars fans in the country, but everyone knows the real marketplace
for high-end hummers is the Internet." Their strategy worked,
and it sold several months ago. The fine ladies at the Earth
were more than happy to give the winning bidder the best hummer
imaginable.
It's the comic you've been waiting for!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-26-01 12:01am
Yes folks... here again your weekly
installment of "The Cantina." This week's comic is
dedicated to the good folks of the fighting 501st, Eastern Squad! They regularly don their stormtrooper
armor and do charity work... a very noble crusade indeed. Check
them out, after you check out "The
Cantina" comic strip!!!
FREE DVD Contest - Enter Now!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 9-26-01 12:01am
We're in the home stretch on our
Free DVD contest, which is sponsored by Essential Comics. Entries
are due Saturday. All you have to do to enter is send in an idea
for "The Cantina" comic strip. Please enter. Please!
You don't realize how out of ideas I am. I mean look at this
week's comic! I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel here! I need
your help!!! If holding a free DVD under your nose isn't enough,
then I don't know what is!!!
Click here for
complete rules and details.
The horrors of eBay compliments of the Dianoga!
Posted by: Dianoga 9-26-01 12:01am
Take a few steps into the gutter that is eBay with your guide, the Dianoga...
Some things are just too sick for words.
Well, maybe one word - OUCH!
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1643216397
To go along with your Super-Rare DT Vader, C9 incomplete...
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1645451392
This guy sure knows how to showcase his
gnome...
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1644012963
Nimrod feels all warm and fuzzy
Posted by: Ric Nimrod 10-3-01 12:01am
After a brief hiatus, Nimrod is
back and full of joy. See, it's a thrilling time in Nimrod's
life. And he's taking it all in typical Nimrod style. You won't
believe your eyes when you read the latest "The
Mighty Nimrod Speaks!!!"
DVD Contest Winners Revealed!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-3-01 12:01am
OK... I begged for two weeks for
somebody... anybody to send in some ideas for my comic strip.
And anybody did!! I'm happy to announce the winners of our contest...
The winner for BEST comic strip idea goes
to... Bryan
Borgman!!! He wins the "What
Lies Beneath" DVD. And he and everybody else gets to see
his idea in print in this week's "The
Cantina" comic strip!!!!
The random winner from the rest of the
entries was regular comic idea contributor Harry Portman.
Harry gets the "Space Cowboys" DVD. Harry has earned
his stripes by submitting numerous ideas for comics to me (several
of which have been used), so it was nice to see him win the random
drawing.
So that's it for our contest. You'll be
seeing some of the other ideas submitted in future "The
Cantina" comics. A big thanks again to Essential
Comics for sponsoring this give-away. Check them out
for great prices on pre-ordered cases of POTJ and
many other toys!
And no, I didn't forget...
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-10-01 12:01am
OK, so maybe Darth
Paul deserves a little bit of credit for this week's update...
If I'm not mistaken, he's the guy that gave me the idea for this
week's "The Cantina"
comic strip!!!
Dianoga Links
Posted by: Dianoga 10-10-01 12:01am
Taking you to the scariest places
on the web... the Dianoga pulls no punches. Click, and be horrified!!!
Here we have a very funny site. But be
warned - ADULTS
ONLY!!!
http://www.newgrounds.com/collections/starwars.html
And here we have the absolutely most horrificly
ugly Star Wars web site these eyes have ever gazed upon. Well,
except for maybe the new Yakface.com layout...
http://www.jedichris.net/
Chewie gets his ass kicked by a Gundark
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1644701398
These guys support the 501st charity events...
that deserves a plug
http://www.toybliss.com/
Entertainment Scalp Interview
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-10-01 12:01am
The Jabba has
posted an interview with Jason Laboscalpawitz of Entertainment Scalp.
It is very informative interview and answers a few questions
concerning Entertainment Scalp
and what they do for the collecting community. Some of their
highlighted services include suggestions on what to do with empty
wallets, and pointers on how best to drop your trousers and grab
your ankles. You don't have to suffer that nasty quad pull ever
again! Click here to read
it.
Top 10 Requested Drinks at the Cantina
Posted by: Big_E 10-10-01 12:01am
10 Hair of the Wamp Rat
9 Flaming Krayt
8 Snoot Job
7 White Rodian
6 Twi'lek Kiss
5 Sex on the Dune
4 TIE Bomber
3 Jawa Juice
2 Fuzzy Hutt
1 Bantha Milk
CreatureCantina.com CONQUERS THE GLOBE!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-10-01 12:01am
The "CreatureCantina.com
Sucks!" phenomenon just keeps growing and growing. First
it was celebrities. Then it was statues. Now, our greatest triumph
yet... CreatureCantina.com Sucks AROUND THE WORLD!
To kick it off... take a gander at this puppy:
Get a load of that, baby! How many other
sites have the balls to START their globe-trotting with freekin'
Antarctica??? The land where Wampa fear to tread? That's just
damn cool, if you ask me. Now that we got the tough continent
down, the rest should be a cakewalk.
Fresh meat... sic 'em, Ewoks!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-10-01 12:01am
CreatureCantina.com is happy to introduce our two newest contributors...
welcome Darth
Paul and Big
E!! Big E rolled out in style with the top ten list below.
DP premiers in true CC.com fashion... missing his first deadline.
But as they say... short help is better than no help. I encourage
everyone to send them a quick E-mail about the big mistake they've
just made.
It's a big update this week... be sure
you read it all!!!
Lastly... and leastly??
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-17-01 12:01am
Somehow it seems like my comic
always ends up at the bottom of the update... so far down that
everybody who would have read it has already passed out from
gut-busting laughter, and thus nobody reads it. But I'm just
a selfless kind of guy... I mean, I know Big E worked
hard on his article. It deserves to be near the top. And you
can't dump the T-shirt give-away or the wedding photos at the
bottom of the update. So the only thing left is my comic. Hopefully
a lot of people will have continued to read all the way to the
bottom of this week's update, so they can enjoy this week's "The Cantina"
comic strip!!!
Secret DVD features - Guest Submission
Posted by: Boba Rocks 10-17-01 12:01am
As we all know, Star Wars Episode
One: The Phantom Menace, saw it's DVD format debut in stores
this week. Some lucky blokes were able to snag it a day or two
ahead of time. To you all I say, big freekin' deal, we'll all
have it some day right? Anyhow, there have been reports nationwide
regarding the bonus disc's "Special Features". It seems
as if the lifelong question of Star Wars fanatics has been answered,
with some convincing..possibly incriminating evidence. Han and
Chewie..was there ever any "history" between the two?
Upon reviewing the "bonus materials" on the second
disc, there was something that apparently sprouted legs and jumped
off the cutting room floor and DIRECTLY into the homes of thousands
of Star Wars fans.
Approximately 5 minutes following the conclusion
of the final chapter on the bonus disc, there is a 3 minute long,
hidden camera taping of Señor Solo and the Wookie..engaging
in some hot..intergalactic love! Not to spoil the surprise for
those of you not technologically in the know, I will say this.
This scene alone is worth buying a DVD player. Raunchier than
Pamela and Tommy..more flamboyant than Liberace and gayer than
Richard Simmons..this is one that will keep you HOT..all winter
long.
Who wants to be... a shirt-owner???
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-17-01 12:01am
Again the Fighting 501st
comes through for CC.com with a great give-away! We're giving
away a T-shirt to one lucky reader... their new "Got Armor"
shirt! Here are some photos:
All you have to do is submit a joke, gag,
poem, or anything at all involving a Stormtrooper. We'll feature
the best entries in next week's update, and one random entrant
will win a shirt!
Please mail your entry, including your name and mailing address,
to: 501st@creaturecantina.com.
Thanks for playing!!!
SoroSuub Announces 0% Financing
Posted by: Big_E 10-17-01 12:01am
With the Empire announcing further
taxation on the Outer Rim worlds SoroSuub announced new 0% financing
on it's popular Gian speeder models in the hopes of stimulating
consumer confidence.
This large, military repuslorcraft is a
modified version of the V-19 speeder. Measuring 5.7 meters in
length and able to transport up to four passengers the speeder
is well equipped with three laser blasters and a top speed of
160 kph. Priced at 24,000* credits this speeder will fit into
the budget of traders and bounty hunters alike.
"Whether you are outrunning Tusken
Raiders or pesky Jawa traders, you won't find a better deal,"
stated junk dealer Watto.
Stop by your nearest SoroSuub dealer or Watto's junk shop and
take one for a test drive.
*Manufacturer's Suggested
Retail Price. Tax, title, license and optional equipment are
extra.
Dianoga serves up some choice beef!
Posted by: Dianoga 10-17-01 12:01am
Mucked from the deepest catacombs
of the slimiest swamps of the smelly region of Dagobah... the
links du jour!
"...can be readily used in any massacre
scene..."
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1649938290
Sure to be on every kid's Christmas list!
Too Cool!!!
http://www.fao.com/products/detail.cfm?objectid=
... 3949
The funniest auction photos I've seen...
hey... those look familiar!
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1649317702
Sucker born every minute... IDIOT born
every 38 seconds!!
http://cgi.ebay.com/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem=1013115283
Congratulations Nimrod!!!!!
Posted by: Bill Cable 10-17-01 12:01am
If everything went according to
plan Saturday, Nimrod is now a married man. We haven't received
the reception photos yet, but we're sure it looked something
like this...
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